Death: In Poetry

An odd little write...written in dead of night

Death: In Poetry

(A silent song)

By

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada 

Where hides death

Beneath the shoals of limerick 

In sea of turquoise discontent 

Far within an absent heart

to breed beneath its broken parts

Where lies death

Beyond a tiny mote of dust

Tethered to our hate and lust

To feel atrophy inside

Withered in our pride 

Where walks death 

In tangent dreams of flight and fall

bereft of sorrow, joy, or calm

Within these memories of past

In friendships which never last 

Where speaks death

Within the silence of our mind

That hide the heartbreaks of our crime

In the destruction we left behind

Of our apathy so unkind 

Where lives death

In all the mysteries never known

Within callous heart made of stone 

It dances to a song of despair 

yet sings to a melody that lingers in air

Where is death...when needed

Author's Note

Wish I had a cool story about how this piece came to exist, but I promised death I would keep it to myself. CLE

Reviews

[Alishba_Anhar]

I loved the poem. It really pulls the reader in.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Alishba for your thoughts on this piece. I feel the same about it because of the dance in words. The different images draw me in when I read it. I was hoping it would do the same for the readers as well. I'm glad it resonates a little in people's hearts. Thank you kindly again.

[keith]

'Where is death...when needed'
hangin with his twin shadow
always there seldom seen close at foot only a thought away
death does not ride the dark horse
it slumbers away the hours until the moment arrives
the gatekeeper if you will
denier of paradise
prerequisite of eternal life
the jokes on you ... this is all there is

as always your writes feed the imagination offering food for thought

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Keith. I like what you wrote. I like dark evocative images painted by words. And this is right up my alley. You should expand on it more and submit it. I think you got the beginning of something unique here. CLE

[keith]

ok ... you asked for it you got it toyota!
post soon to follow

[plaosi]

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[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me on this poem.

[Ken e Bujold]

A splendid poem CLE. The imagery, as well as meter and rhyme, harken back to days of old'n time, the great lyrics of Shakey Bill, Blind John, and the melancholy Pope. Really really enjoyed the read. And the killer last couplet is to die for :)

Ken

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Ken for sharing your thoughts with me. I love dancing with words and painting evocative images in the reader's mind. I try in most of my work hitting the senses so that one can feel the texture in the portraits of poetry I write. At times I may be overly effusive, but it is done by intent. I used to only write short stories and it wasn't until coming here to this community did I begin to concentrate on poetry. It is a genre of many styles, and yet I always find myself drawn to ryhme. I find it so endearing to my heart and one that captures the passionate style I seek to emulate. I am in constant evolution as a poet though and hope to touch upon the other aspects of this art form eventually. CLE

[John the Baptist]

After many speculations, an abrupt question: Where is death....when needed? Those in intractable pain or debilitating dementia must ask this question often. For all of the dread inspired by the big sleep, our attitude is yet mixed. A lot of good observations in this one, but in the end, there is only one certainty: It is coming. That said, maybe Marcus Aurelius had the most sensible attitude: Death is but a natural process, and therefore not to be feared.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

I agree wholeheartedly with that belief about death and its inevitability. We can wax poetic, or not, on this subject but in the end it is eventual. And inescapable. One can either face it with a smile, or cry of pure terror. Thank you my friend for your enlightened comment on this poem.

[W. Barrett Munn]

A really fine poem Carlos. I think I might like it even more if somewhere in the body there was a little tension added, a little break in rhythm before the rhythm restarts on into the conclusion.

Winston

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Winston for your comment. For the subject this poem is discussing you're probably right. Death is a serious subject that needs added tension to drive the point forward. Not an easy subject to tackle. As I explained to Lisa in the comment below it is an intimate topic that draws from one's experience. I can only explain my perspective from what little of death I've experienced in my life. I feel in all honesty that the short story I wrote called 'In moments" better defined my thoughts about death and its melancholic wonders. Thank you again my friend for your comment.

[Lisasview]

Oh my goodness Carlos...
Such a difficult topic to write about...when so close to home... I love the divisions you made in your poem..
asking just the right questions and then at the end wanting to know where death was when one needed it. This gave me shivers.
The thing is that your poem came to exist because this hard question is within us all and you were open enough to write it down... I say bravo...
I wrote a poem, Forevermore, about my own death.. not sure if you read it or not...
Lisa, now in Tarragona, Spain..for 5 days

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you Lisa for your thoughts on this poem. I very much enjoyed your remarkable poem Forevermore. Death like love is a difficult subject to tackle. I feel both require an intimate knowledge in order to capture profound meaning, and much of the time it is speculative or skewed by our own perspective. My understanding of death comes from holding my father's hand when he passed away. I wrote about it in a short piece called 'In moments'. Perhaps one of the most difficult pieces I ever had to write. When my father died I actually stopped writing for almost 15 years. I found it impossible to dictate the experience I had in that moment. There were no words to explain the feeling of death. Only the emotion of it. Death lingers everywhere I feel. Whether amorphous or in the physical; relationships or flesh. All things eventually have their endings only to possibly evolve into something greater, or better. Death is only quiet change I like to believe. Thank you so much for your thoughts on this poem.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This is wonderful verse. And I enjoyed reading it. I read it over several times. I'm reminded of a Biblical verse, "Death has been swallowed up in victory. Where, O Death, is your victory? Where, O Death, is your sting?” 1 Corinthians 15:55 Your poem searches out the abode and motives of death but not the victory over it. Do any have victory? Is there no balm in Gilead? I like what the poet John Donne wrote about it nearly four centuries ago in his famous poem, "Death Be Not Proud. It's also called Holy Sonnet 10.

Death, Be Not Proud

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou are not so;
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy or charms can make us sleep as well
And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Excellent comment Fabian. I recently read an article on Donne and his work. I so very much enjoyed it and am looking forward to reading more of his poetry. He sure captured death so eloquently in his remarkable poem and had me wishing I could write with as much passion as he. Reading the works of these masterful writers are always an educational experience. They teach us what it takes to ply our craft and respect the art form. Poetry will never die, it is death's equal. When one ceases so will the other. CLE

[Neville]

it was quite an honour to find this Carlos .. it reminded me, not only of my own mortality, but also, of why I first fell in love with this particular art form ................ Neville

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you kindly Neville for your review. It means a lot. Death is not an easy subject and even worse to dwell upon for too long. Even for art. But I wanted to write a bit of playfulness on the subject. I may have danced a little too close up to the line hehe. But I'm sure death forgives me. I mean it does tend to have a bit of dark humor to it. Thank you again my friend for sharing your thoughts with me.

[John Prophet]

Deep resonance in this write. Well penned as always CLE

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you JP coming from you these words truly mean a lot to me. I really appreciate it.