Moonshine Wisdom

These little gems of unknown wisdom are best served intoxicated on Nature's piss.

Moonshine Wisdom 

By

Carlos Lorenzo Estrada 

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. 

-Mark Twain

Having more then one tooth ain't gonna make you smile better.

Throwing a bird against the wall won't make it fly.

More then one way to skin a cat, but only five ways to kick a dog.

If at first you don't succeed; why try again? No one's asking you to, dumbass.

Spit and grit will fix it, if that don't work piss on it.

Grandma said: a swift kick in the balls solves every man's problems.

One wife is a marriage, four...a problem.

As a patriot I love God and country, but I'm sure as s**t friends with the devil.

Author's Note

Thank you for reading this work. Feel free to comment and share your own profound Moonshine Wisdom...

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

That sounds like some talk around these here Appalachian Mountains, in the back woods...I like the old wisdom here...don't say anything is it's foolish, keep your mouth shut, a kick in the balls will do it; have seen that in many movies; and one wife is plenty.....have you ever tried moonshine; all the good ole boys still make it around here; it tastes like pure alcohol!
Clever!
Best, B

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you, Betty, I couldn't stop laughing at your enjoyable reply. I must admit I never tried Moonshine but I have unfortunately tried chewing tobacco or as a friend called it, Chaw. I literally threw up from that God forsaken foul stuff. Though before my demise into the great beyond I would like a sip of ol Moonshine. But it would probably send me to my grave quicker considering I don't drink alcohol at all. I literally can get drunk on drunk people's burps. Thank you so much for the fun reply.

[Dave Brown]

That is all good stuff but I do have some sympathy for the dog.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Thank you, Dave, for commenting on this work. I feel bad for them too and also the 4 wives.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

wow I hear this one.
If four is a problem, maybe my three is just a gnat to flick off my shoulder.

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

I know I shouldn't be laughing at that analogy but you had me crying in hilarity. Thank you, sir, well played. Hahaha