School such fun...

October 2nd Today in gym I did not have to shower with the others because I was on clean up duty. Thank the heavens! I noticed that KJ is not in my classes. I am guessing KJ is in a different class set. But KJ was in the gym I watched KJ the whole time. We both did not do much just sat there waiting for the bell. I want to talk to KJ so so bad but I am too wimpy to even make eye contact. Oh my gosh, I hate my life!

 October 6th I bumped (more like pushed) into KJ today in the hall almost knocking Kj over by Katie. I felt so bad. Then after 3 second period, Katie stole my notebook from my beg and started to when Katie was holding it in the air say " You want it, huh? jump for it doggy"( I hate her so much). then she throw it and told me to fetch. I ran down the hall and reached for it but Kj had it first and was handing it to me when I looked into KJ's beautiful dark brown eyes. I felt myself starting to blush and I ran to the bathroom confused. I ran as fast as I could. at that moment, I remembered I had left my notebook in the hall. I am so stupid. Why would anyone like KJ like me? 

October 11th so a lot happened since I last wrote. So KJ returned my notebook and we talked a few minutes. We have been greeting each other at school every day and KJ joined me for lunch for two days now. KJ is so nice and sweet. I want to give my number to KJ but I am so scared. maybe I will just invite KJ to hang out. Yes, that's what I am doing. I cant back out now.

October 13th KJ came over and we spent the whole day together. We watched movies. We played tag and hide and seek. We went to the park. Went on a bike ride and so much more. Today was the best day of my life. I am still confused about my feelings. Like maybe it's a phase? (ugh, I sound like my mother.) No, it is real, right? Why do I feel this way?                                        

October 17th KJ and I have been hanging out every day. The outcasts have welcomed KJ and but I don't know if I want KJ around them. KJ is so good looking someone might take KJ from me.  what am I saying? (Crazy much? like KJ is mine or ever will be?) Why can't I just be an emotionless robot?!!!!!!!!!!