How Can We Be So Compassionate With Others But Not Be Merciful Enough For Ourselves?

Sometimes you do not want to be alone, especially on difficult days but you have to listen with your own testimonies.

As soon as I open my eyes, it seems darkness has overcome me in the early morning. Exhausted and tired to start the day. I cannot force myself to get up from my bed. There is this quest that always comes into my head whenever I feel this energy "How can I survive throughout the day?" I am truly sad when there is a cloudy day coming and devouring me. It made me anxious and I began to cry silently. I took a deep breath. Inhale. Exhale. Multiple times. From that moment that I caught a positive thought, I grasped it. I make sure that I have a good grip on it and take that as a tool to make my day more meaningful and meaningful. Happy and full of energy to cope. There was no coffee in the cupboard, and no breakfast, so I decided to drink a glass of water. Down the stairs is my working place. I open our computer and check my to-do list on my phone. Before I started to work, I bowed my head and started to pray. I pray that I may have a productive day, to give me hope and energy to fulfill this day with dignity. I ended my prayer with a smile on my face because I knew He had heard me. I started working 5 hours without eating and drinking. I stopped because I felt I had to eat and take a nap. It is so refreshing because I reserved and conserved energy in me. I checked the time on my phone and the time of my class in the afternoon was approaching, so I went to eat again and get ready for my class. And here we are, writing an essay for this activity. Taking care of myself is super vital for me. Loving your own is hard because you know who you are, the mistakes you commit, and the shortcomings that you don't fulfill. I know I am trying and I know I am halfway there. I know there will be a lot of crying and hardships but I will enjoy the ride no matter what. Maybe there is more to cry about, and that is okay, I guess? It is okay to feel weak. You are a human being and your flaws make you the true "you". You are unique in that way. Life has always been disappointing but I don't want to be a disappointment for myself. It is just life and it is me. And most of all He is the driver, how could I ever be worried?