Chapter 2 FIRST CONTACT

Making contact with someone new is hard and scarey for Zack, giving is a great way to warm a cold heart.

FIRST CONTACT

 

Zack resting in his bed twirling a writing pen with his fingers, a pen makes a great tool to spark the imagination.  You can pretend with its slender design that it is a rocket ship blasting into deep space exploring; the pen can be the body of an airplane just adds the wings and cockpit flying over the skies of Germany during the big war protecting the bombers making there run.  The pen can be a large battle ship patrolling the high seas or a canoe on the river of uncharted jungle in 19^th century South America.  Missionary Zack and his guide Pak, looking for the Vivian-to-to tribe, other missionary had try to make contact but they never been heard from again.  Now Zack feel the calling to reach these people for the Lord.  He left the canoe following Pak into the jungle cutting thick branches along the way hearing distant drums.  After many miles of walking Missionary Zack spotted the village fear grip him wondering if these people will kill him or would he somehow be able to communicate that he mean no harm wanting to be friends.

 

He enters the grounds of the village seeing brown skin natives busy and children playing until they notice Zack each person stared.  He was disappointed because none of the women was topless because Zack imagination has a rated G filter in place, the guide spoke to an older woman she lead them to the queen hut.  The queen, a tall young woman, step from her home frowning, Zack bow out of respect to her.

 

“Ga Ga Ta Ta,” said the Queen.

 

“She has been expecting you and she know why you are here, you want her people to convert to your God,” said Pak, interpreting the Queen

 

“Did she say all of that with such few syllables?”  Ask Zack.

 

“Yes, do you want me to repeat it?”  Zack motion his head no the guide continue, “If you passed the test you will become King and I will convert, but if you fail you will be tonight dinner.”  Wondering about the test Zack is nervous.

 

The Queen spoke, “BA, BA, GA, GA, PHY, PHY.”

 

“The test is arm wrestling.”  Zack heard that, he was pleased because he paid his way through seminary training by arm wrestling and the queen will be his opponent, ‘peace a cake’ he thought.  Both of them walk to an old tree stump to compete, the test ‘start’ she is strong but Zack held then his strength started to over taken her.  The Queen pull a string on her gown dropping enough fabric exposing her shoulder, neck and maybe more, Zack viewing her skin look up she blew a kiss and wink at him.  The distractions cause him to lose concentration slamming his hand on the stump. Zack disappointed in the lost because the Queen used her womanly wilds and worst of all it worked.  Pak laughing, “Well guest what’s for dinner?”

 

Zack quickly scan the people with strange grins hearing knifes sharpening, he leap to his feet backing slowly, “Your highness I will leave those Bibles and you can read them at your earliest convenience, I suggest you start with St. John.”  Running out the village as four warriors gave chase shooting poison darts.  Zack running trying to make himself a hard target zigzagging, he approaches the river diving swimming under water.  He surface for air and did not see any warriors a strong current caught him leading to the waterfall Zack tumble over flailing his arms and legs.  He plunge into the water below, Zack pop up coughing, sore and exhausted.  He grabs the thicket pulling his self out of the river laid on his back looking up at the sky.

 

“The things I do for the Lord,” suddenly he yawned became drowsy he reach over to a tree trunk flip a light switch turning off the light as he slept in his bed.

 

Standing at the doors of the school suspension room, Zack stare at the doorknob nervous because he is entering uncharted territory.  Turning the knob he peak inside the room seeing a few students sitting at tables, Zack timidly enter the room finding the sign-in sheet on the teacher’s desk.  Scanning the room he viewed Vivian isolated at the far end, natural instinct say stay far away as possible from her.  However, he felt compel to yield to his spirit and proceed to sit at her table; his heart pounding beads of sweat appear on his forehead as he sat.” Hello,” greeted Zack, but Vivian reading a text book did not respond, he was relive that he made it this far. 

 

Later that morning Vivian reading another text book and writing feeling someone is watching her, lifting her head looking around everybody busy working so she went back to her reading again she felt that someone is intensely inspecting her.  She quickly raises her head and saw nothing she viewed Zack writing, she kept her eyes on him turning pages and scribbling on her paper.  Zack tilt his head to peak at Vivian, he saw her eyes, and quickly turns his head back to his book.  Vivian slams her pen down and lend back in her chair folding her arms.

 

“What!  Why are you looking at me?”  Ask Vivian with a harsh tone, Zack glance at her frightened to answer, “Say something are do you want me to finish what I started yesterday?”

 

“I’m sorry,” said Zack in a nervous voice, “I know that some of the girls say you had an ugly face, but I disagree, so I was looking to see if my conclusion was right.

 

“So tell me where those little witches right?”

 

“No!  You have a nice facial structure and your brown eyes are clear with a sparkle, your nose is shape a way that half the girls in this school would kill to have, your lips are full, cheeks and chin is place very nicely.  I think you could make a good model.”  She unfolded her arm chuckling.

 

“Look little man, those twit don’t know much but they do know what pretty or not and they right about my face it’s not pretty, so stop the nice talk.” 

 

Zack find it odd that Vivian thinks herself not pretty, but in his mind, he knows she is can be attractive.  Lunchtime roll around and the students in suspension cannot eat lunch with the general population, they have to eat in that room.  Zack brought a bag lunch, he pull out a prepackaged ham and cracker box, an apple and carrot sticks.  Then he notice what Vivian is eating for lunch two candy bar with peanuts, can of cola and what look like homemade cookies in a Ziploc bag.  Zack was surprise that Vivian lunch is all junk food, but he was hesitant to say something, but he found the nerve.

 

“Is that your lunch?”  Ask Zack in a timid voice.

 

She cutting her eyes at him, “If you must know, this is my lunch everyday.” 

 

Zack slide his apple to toward her, “Here you can have this, its good for you,” smile Zack.

 

“I don’t want that,” glaring at the apple chewing her candy bars, the fruit remain on the table and before lunch period was over she took the apple putting it in her pocket.  That evening Vivian studying her face in the bathroom mirror, hearing Zack voice pretty description of her face in her mind and his opinion she could be a model.  Suddenly she laughs under her breath shaking her head no turn off the lights leaving the bath grabbing the apple flopping into bed proceed to eat the very tasty fruit.

 

The next morning Zack double prepare his lunch he pack two prepackaged ham and cracker boxes, two apples and two bags of carrots sticks. Lunch period roll around he presented his lunch to Vivian hopping she would not throw it back at him with pierce eyes at him she accepted his gift and Zack is well please.  She did not say thank you but Zack felt encourage this could be a making of a friendship.

 

Friday the last day of In School Suspension lunch period Zack upset with himself because, he did not have his and Vivian lunch.  Waking up late, he was rushing to get ready for school and be on time he forgot to grab lunch only remembering at the start of lunch period.  Vivian smirking sitting across from him, “Well, where lunch?”

 

“I’m Sorry Vivian, I was rushing and I forgot our lunch,” said Zack disappointed, Vivian preceded pulling out of her pockets candy bars, a can of cola and homemade cookies, she slide the cookies to Zack.  He was grateful of Vivian act of kindness.  “Thank you,” said Zack she give him an acknowledging nod.  Eating the cookies, he thought it was the best cookies ever; warm, chewy and moist it had a rich flavor, “These are great, did your mother bake these?”

 

“No, Gloria bakes them,” answered Vivian.

 

“Gloria, who is she?”

 

“She is that woman who was with me in Mrs. Carter office last Monday.”

 

“I thought that was your mom.”

 

“No, she is my foster mom.”

 

“I would have thought that’s your mom because she gave you the mommy look.”

 

Vivian suddenly stops eating the candy bar puzzle staring at Zack, “The mommy look, what that?”

 

“The mommy look is a certain type of gaze that mothers give her child when she knows he is asleep or not looking at her.  I seen it with my mom when look at my sister when she was sleeping and she thought she was alone.  She gave me that look when she thought I was asleep, I seen it with mothers with newborns and that look when her child is old.  That stare I think is a combination of a prayer, a wish and thankfulness.”

 

“So you saw Gloria give me that look in Mrs. Carter office, so what does it mean?”

 

“Well this is only theory,” said Zack eating the second cookie, “Like I said it like a prayer:

Thank you for this beautiful wonderful baby,

Thank you for this gift and great reasonably for raising her,

I want to be a great mother, but I am unsure I am doing everything right,

I pray that I can love unconditional,

I want the wisdom to guide her through this life journey with peace and happiness,

I do not want to make a mistake,

Please if she hurting she can come to me for comfort,

Help me Lord to do right by her, to have wisdom when speaking, to have patience,

I do not want her to be hurt, or ever feel she all alone,

Lord protect my child,”

 

Zack suddenly stop, Vivian took a sip of her cola and they sat in silence.

 

Zack clearing his throat, “Well is just a theory…wow… this is a great cookie.”

Author's Note

I hope Zack imagination mini shorts is not confusing to the main story

Reviews

[The Winter Grey]

So I noticed that this is a "chapter;" I'm not sure if it's a beginning chapter or if it's from the middle of a story, but I digress. As far as the grammar, punctuation, and overall polish, yeah, it could use some work.

But in terms of the story itself, I think you show a lot of potential. There are a couple of moments of incoherency - and I'm not really sure who this Vivian is, but that may be because I've read this chapter out of context. But moments such as (1) Where Vivian stares into the mirror, trying to see what Zack had seen of her beauty and (2) when Zack explains the "mommy look," then abruptly redirects his attention to the cookie when he receives no reply are great. Als, the "G-rated filter" thing, I personally found hilarious.

[paparapapa]

I have to admit that it kind of confused me. Haha. But I think the problem will be solved by just adding a few more words to make it clearer. Like for example a loud noise brought him back to reality or something like that. :)) But I loved the part when he ran so fast because he didn't want to be the tribe's dinner. That was so funny. =)) The part about lunch was a bit fast for me. It jumped from one day to that night immediately then on to the next day. It would help I think if you put them in different paragraphs to delineate the different scenes. This is just what I think though. Anyway, interesting chapter. But you have to, again, edit it some more because it gets kind of confusing at times. :)