On You, Across The Table

We all want to believe our children will love us
Hold us, kiss us, stay with us,
and wrap their little hands around our fingers
Big eyes watch big people with big love

But they're a squirmy type
Run away, out of our arms
No matter how far we stretch

Exploring dust bunnies in corners
Carrying shoes to bury in the sand box
They all, will all, run away

And you see then,
Perhaps they are not yours.

Individuals behind those big eyes
And we, again, are left to watch
Like past loves left,
Mother, fathers, gone,
And a thousand friends,
drifted away

We own no one,
Our children owe nothing
And we will all realize how little we are
How alone we are

And in that we must find some happiness
We must find some truth
For them, for us,
For you

Reviews

[Nathan Strange]

Hey man, Charles, I've never read much of your stuff and I'm not gonna blow sunshine up your arse as you are the owner of the website. Let me tell you something pal, this is f*****g good mate. It sums up how I feel at the moment! I'm just sitting in front of my computer screen waiting for the computer to speak to me, waiting for reviews. I'm too tired to review at the moment, I can't think let alone read!
I have a beer in front of me sitting by the keyboard. My forehead is creased up, my eyes black, yet I sit here endlessly, waiting for inspiration to write something. I have this dying urge to want to produce just something, even if it's tedious, yet I know that I'm in no state of mind to write anything half decent.
I saw you were on line and thought, let me read something of Charles's for once. He is responsible for this site. Well man your words spoke to me, that last stanza;

Unable to maintain this moment
This connection
This intimacy
Required to record it
Such is the curse of a writer

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I love the first lines.. they drew me in.. the poem is very alsmot to me private... as if between you and 'she'.. truly enjoyed it..

Chloe
xoxo

[Poeticpiers]

Writing is not a substitute for living.It is merely a means of recording how you see lifeEssentaillya solitary occupation unless you are fortunate enough as I am to be married to another writer.Who is content just to be physically near you whilst your mind is othewhere

[Tammara-Nicole Gardner]

So poignant and true.

[Erin Warde]

I like how this is written.. I often enjoy these moments myself, so reading about them just helps me realize I'm not strange to "people watch," as I sometimes do, haha. You pay attention to detail and (though I don't know you) it seems that you've incorporated a lot of personal attributes into it -- both features add quite a bit. Very nice. :)

[Lyra Day]

Good heavens I love this poem...

It made me so sad... still... I paused... and... willed the next few lines to be happier.. but despite its sadness (to me) there is always something worth celebrating in the idea that someone can be loved.. and that only real intimacy is acheived with real love.. of another.

I love this poem... truly.

Sam

[Ebby]

Your first stanza is beautiful and captures the feeling that so many who live in their own heads feel on a daily basis.
The subject matter is so very tangible to me, the intensity with which one feels things, but in a blink, in one tiny lifetime of a second.
I feel that you could improve this with a slight rearranging of your punctuation, for example, the last two lines of the first stanza would be more powerful if on the same line, and the last line of the third stanza feels a little out of place. My opinion is my own though, and reading the reviews below, I do not think you will find it necessary to edit.
Your social commentary and sharpness of observation shines through.
Sante,

Eloise.

[Ice Queen of the Vampir..]

This is beautiful. I love it!!!

Heather

[Tiffany Pochatko]

Do you ever think that people are being bias when they review your work, just because of who you are? Just wondering =]].
Haha, no really though, I do agree, this is really good. I love the visual I get from this. I actually used a few lines similar to yours once.
Lovely ending.
Lovely piece.

[revolution9]

This is a great piece. It is also something that many of the writers on this site can relate to. I can relate to it for sure. This is a perfect poem! I can only say good things about it. Wonderful, simply wonderful!

Writing, and believing
It's more important than living

[Crap!]

Writing IS living. Like the bikers say, "live to ride, ride to live" I could just replace (ride) with write. My joy in life is never full until it finds its way to a page. My unwritten moments are the ones they will bury with me but the rest is my grip on eternity.I loved this poem because I could relate to it and still, I say, not MORE important but of equal importance...to me.