Crimson Pain

Bulling made me crimson; I made me white.

She told me I would never be enough

Crimson

She told me I was ugly

Crimson

She told me everyone hated me

Crimson

She told them what she thought of me

Crimson

She was Crimson

They told me I was fat

Crimson

They told me to kill myself

Crimson

They were in my dreams

They were Crimson

I told myself no one would ever love me

Crimson

I told myself I needed to lose weight

Crimson

I told myself that my dad abandoned me

Crimson

I told myself that all the fighting was because of me

Crimson

My pain was worse than theirs

I became Crimson

I broke

Black

The knife started to cut

Black

I was there in front of me

Black

It wasn’t me

Black

They surrounded me

Black

They cried

Black

Everything became Black

I was Black

I cried

Grey

I was tired

Grey

I was worn

Grey

I wanted it to stop

I became Grey

I realized that I was loved

White

I realized I was enough

White

I realized I was under weight

White

I realized I could move on

I rose in White

I still remember

Crimson

I still hate

Black

I still stop and think

Grey

I still continue to soar

White

She broke; but not because of me

Crimson

Reviews

[Sinbulvinter]

Wow. This is really emotional and sad. It makes me so upset that people can be so cruel to one another, and bullying has gotten so bad among young people it worries me for my daughter.
As a teenager, I was told a lot of messed up lies that I started to believe for a while. People would say I was a freak, or call me crazy and s**t like that. It really worn me down, I got into some bad habits, drinking, cutting, eating disorders, etc. It took me a while to realize they were wrong and I can be whoever I want to be.
I hope you come to see that, and by the words in your poem I see you have. Keep on soaring and get passed those people's words. To be yourself is all that you can do, and people may have a problem with that - but they aren't worth your time.

[Estraya]

Stay strong. this poem is amazing.