Slow Country

city life

calling me all the time

me and my soul

geared to attack

never get another chance

so what you doing

gotta get money

keeping me real

can't stand your loneliness

can't stand your loneliness

can't stand your loneliness

can't stand your loneliness

the night life

been trying not to laugh though

you won't get money

i'm doing what you loving

i'm moving out of city

victor of a second chance

get a lot of problems

we kicked a lot of them

Reviews

[Blue]

This makes me want to party. Haha. Night life, eh? Cool.

[Frieda P]

This one makes a statement, I just happened to be listening to So Cold by Breaking Benjamin and it wrapped the lyrics around your words quite nicely.

[Talia The Hedgehog]

yes i agree. i LOVE Breakig Benjamin.

[Frieda P]

Underrated band, they're really good...

[Talia The Hedgehog]

i forget, have they broken up yet?

[Frieda P]

Not that I know of, there was that dispute amongst band members, not sure what happened after that though.

[Talia The Hedgehog]

yeah. i think like, one went to jail 4 drug abuse. y' know?

[Frieda P]

I don't really follow them that closely, my friend from the UK turned me onto their music...I just listen and enjoy.

[Talia The Hedgehog]

LOL, i am in the UK.

[Frieda P]

Ahhh probably why you're a big fan...

[Talia The Hedgehog]

no. mostly (as u can tell) i have been watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ever since i was little. and ever since i had a crush on the nerdy purple one, Donatello/Donnie. LOL

[Frieda P]

Oh geez, are you sure you're not Pete? haha

[Talia The Hedgehog]

lol. nah. i've been obbsessed with them from age 2

[Shaquana Adams]

city life
calling me all the time
me and my soul

I love these lines. I also find the repetition to be very useful and unique in this poem. Great job :)

[Talia The Hedgehog]

thank you!

[Lyn Anderson]

Very effective use of repetition to make your point. A solid piece.

[Linda alexander]

can't stand your loneliness
can't stand your loneliness
can't stand your loneliness
can't stand your loneliness
I really liked the reinforcing the idea, a very smart write, can see the smile through the lines when I read I am doing what you you loving in your mind, that is the smile of the smart person

[Sami Khalil]

Slow country, night life away from the hustle and bustle, loving what we do...A splendid poem...:).............

[Talia The Hedgehog]

thanks! i enjoy doing this! (also because i am downtown England and i am bored.) lol

[Sami Khalil]

Yep. You are welcome...:).....................................

[Talia The Hedgehog]

it's ALWAYS nice to have a GOOD reveiw every one in a while

[Sami Khalil]

Yep. :).......................

[Talia The Hedgehog]

LOL............

[Sami Khalil]

:)............................

[Shirlena]

I really like this poem a lot Melan...it so uniquely worded. You are good, the emotions are good but you choice of verbiage is the star. I think you write somewhat like me, even though you use simple language you found a clever way of expressing yourself. This one goes on my shelf....good read.

[Talia The Hedgehog]

yeah. i am out downtown in England and i thoughit might be cool to make a poem about it!