"Metalbird"

"fighter jets"

Bird echoes, calls rain

     Thunder strikes, quenched as a fire

               ashes mold mushrooms

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"Metalbird'
L.C.Jarrette,
I see by the title and the little note above 'fighter jets it is not readily understood at least by me. Well the poem itself is rather natural and seems as if you are writing about the natural world. I was intrigued and still am. I would love to hear what inspired this poem as it has gotten my interest.
blessings,
Kathy

[William Liston]

This one's certainly creative. I love how the brevity of this poem (characteristic of the haiku form) allows the message to resonate. Your images and descriptions throughout are certainly evocative. I also enjoyed the subtle interplay of nature and man-made weaponry in your title, as you describe a fighter jet as a "metal bird" and reflect that same theme in your poem. On top of that, your picture really sets the tone. Well done.

- William Liston
(PS: Did you intend for your first line to hang off the side of your picture?)

[L.C. Jarrette]

yes sir, why do you ask? :)

[Richard🖌]

Such a powerful Senryu, LC, that reaches deep into one's core, reawakening that which we all should never forget in the devastation by humankind to all life … such a fantastic title and an aptly meaningful picture you've selected, too.
There are certain Western rules that apply to the Japanese Haiku and Senryu forms I will gladly share with you, if you're interested and do not already know them (just message).

Thank you most gratefully for sharing this finely rendered piece from your alert mind and caring heart! ⁓ Richard : )

[L.C. Jarrette]

oh my...of all my poems I never expected that you would choose to post a review on this one. thank you very much sir. (teary eyed...)

[Richard🖌]

You are most welcome … my offer still stands.

[Rathore]

What a pretty mix of rain, thunder, fire and ashes. A small beauty.

[L.C. Jarrette]

wow!!thank you for appreciating my haiku sir. it really means a lot to me..
:)

[L.C. Jarrette]

here's a haiku for you...

[The earth (Titan maphah..]

Nice, well penned........ like it

[L.C. Jarrette]

thank you..

[The earth (Titan maphaha)]

you are welcome...