Miracle

I was walking down the hill toward the looming wall of the night forest. The full moon stole patches of bright white from the deepening shadows, as I left the openness of the fields behind. The last glimpses of the distant village lights dove one by one into the dark mesh of twisted branches. I stepped off the country road letting it run its winding course to Vougeot, and off to Chambertin, as it passes through the endless picturesque vineyards. I worked there many falls ago during the harvest seasons. And it was one of those falls when I found my miracle. The miracle of her.

I remember the silver shine of the lake up ahead with the rising moon glittering through the dense bushes. The steady twinkle of the stars in the calm waters. The muffled sounds of the night with occasional cry of some creature making its presence known. Something else was in that warm early September air. Something to make one unexpected visitor to slow down and to listen to the quiet. Was it a splash? And another one? More sounds were coming almost at the edge of the hearing, as I crawled to a stop, and peeked anxiously through the leaves.

I raised my head. Could not see much at first. Water ripples. Light wind rushing through the leaves. I saw it then.

I saw them.

And, I saw her.

Shapes translucent. Moonlight cutting through them easily. As if some silky forms descended into the cool waters, splashing, playing, laughing. That light itself taking shapes, morphing into lines, curves, traces of the bodies, gradually getting filled with essence, as I watched mesmerized, unblinking, holding my breath in fear not to disturb.

I can't recall exactly how many there were. All I saw really was her, and her only. My thoughts seemed to freeze unable to process what eyes were seeing. Because at that moment, this was far beyond any reasonable explanation even my excited imagination could produce. I could see her hair wavering and rippling under the strong gusts of completely insensible wind. I could hear her happy laughter in the otherwise dead quiet of the night. I watched the moonlight curving sensually in the graceful arch of her lower back. I gasped as the chilly water droplets sparked with the myriads of twinkling lights covering her full breasts, reflecting off her bare back and shoulders with each twist and turn of her frame. Even the white lily she had in her dark hair seemed to weave seamlessly into her breathtaking beauty. I don't know how much time had passed. A minute, an hour, an eternity. I sensed not where I was. I breathed with each breath she was taking. My mouth was whispering trying to repeat each word she exchanged with her sisters. My eyes could only see the light reflected off her presence. The rolling tension stopped finally in the center of my chest threatening to explode my heart from within. And then she turned.

She threw one curious look toward my hiding spot as if none of the natural barriers existed between us at all. Our eyes met for just an instant. But that was the instant when a train of images flooded my mind taking over my consciousness. I saw all my lives - past, present and future, as flashing glimpses of senses, feelings and events. Most of those I could not even recall or comprehend yet, but all were leading to one repeating moment transcending my time and space through all of my existences - me meeting her. And then the darkness collapsed throwing me into the infinite spin towards the bottomless abyss of my worst fears. The fears to lose this moment forever.

They said they finally found me two days later. Clothes torn. Eyes wild. Barely breathing. Fever burning through my body like wildfire. I had no recollection of what happened after I stepped into the forest. I had no recollection of how I made it out. Or what was the significance of a white lily I held so tight in my hand. People said their likeness used to grow by the mountain lake deep into the forest, but it dried up several decades ago. I kept the lily. Didn't know why. All those years. Until now. Until I knew again. The realization happened one morning. I opened my eyes and knew it all. As if a veil had been lifted. As if I've been dreaming all that time, seeing her eyes, waiting for her return.

I am here now. Two decades passed. I still remember the way. The clearing and the meadow covered with tall grasses. That's where I saw her. Or at least that's where I remember my miracle happened. I put the lily onto the ground. I whisper goodbye. I turn away. I will not come back here again. Not in this life. I hear a splash of water. Quiet and quick, right on the edge of hearing. I don't turn. There is no need. I know the flower is not there. I smile and continue on my way. And I feel her playful eyes smiling back radiantly.