Depression

I feel as if I'm drowning in my own pathetic, sad thoughts. I feel as if I'm at war with my own mind and losing. It's like nothing can make me happy again because no matter what there will always be a piece of me that is unhappy and torturing me in the back of my mind. I literally feel like I'm going insane and the stress makes its no better. School and people pressuring me to do more and do better when I'm doing the best I can with an unorganized mind. I honestly get so depressed and anxious that I can't move because I'm so drained from this sadness and this stress. I feel as if I'm already dead or living in my worst nightmare. I don't think I can count how many times I want to cry a day. I feel so empty and so cold and I hate it, I hate that I have to take medication to make it through the day without thoughts of killing myself, I hate that my mind is my worst enemy, and I really hate that this will last forever...