~Chapter One~

~Chapter One~

A Chapter by Blue Waffles

1

 

As I walk to my apartment, a chill runs down my spine and I increase my pace. Soon I’m jogging, and then running. Who knows what will happen to me today. You can’t even walk home without those nagging thoughts of a serial killer, jumping out of nowhere and killing you. The city isn’t safe at night. My mom was mugged, and my dad, worse. My sister was almost killed when she was home alone, and now I’m on my own. There is no one on the streets, nothing to hide behind, no cars driving by, it’s like a scene in one of those horror movies before the victim gets kidnapped, or killed.

 

My family was killed in a car accident. I was 15 at the time. It’s been three years since that drunken b*****d hit the mini mobile. They were just shopping. I was babysitting the land lady’s 3 year old toddler. After they died, I was an orphan, no one in this world to go to, all alone, crying myself to sleep at night in that abandoned building.

 

Then, I got a job. I worked as a waitress. It was hard, but it was worth it. I bought a lottery ticket every chance I got. I eventually got some money, one-thousand, and two hundred and sixty-five dollars to be exact. Someone asked me how I got through all that. I honestly don’t know. I’m surprised that I’m still alive. I got another job. I get more money, but I hate the noise. There is always someone talking and I have a constant headache. I’ve had it for so long, I named it Bob.

 

I was about to reach my apartment building when all of a sudden, a car door opens and a man steps out. I got one of those mini heart attacks that occur when you lean back in a chair and almost fall over. The man stops and stares at me, I stare back at him. I was still. My leg was still raised, like I was about to take another step. I was ready to attack, my left hand was balled into a fist, and my right hand was curved, like I was about to strangle a man. My eyes were focused on the man, it was like a cowboy movie, and I was ready to strike, ready for the arch enemy to make its next move, ready to die.

 

The man was staring at me, his hand in his pocket, a gun perhaps, or maybe a knife. Whatever it was, it was possibly going to be the thing that killed me. Then the guy pulled his hand out of his pocket, and went “Wanna mint?” And held out a box of, well, mints. Then there was one of those awkward three seconds where you just stare at the other guy. Yep, it was three seconds, and it was awkward. Then my brain cells recovered and went back to work. Yeah, they were working on making me say, “WHAT THE F**K?!? I was ready to kill you, and then you just say out of nowhere, wanna mint? What the f**k is wrong with you? You don’t just scare the crap outta someone and then offer them mints. That’s just stupid.”

 

“So, do you want a mint?” Mr. Mint Guy asked.

 

“No, I don’t want no mints, I already sai- oh are those Ice Breakers? Okay, I’ll have just one.” I walked over there slowly, my fist balled and raised in the air, just to show I meant business, and grabbed a mint. I sniffed it just to make sure it was okay to eat. It didn’t smell funky so I popped it in my mouth. Mmm, sour watermelon. Then after a while, I remembered that he was still there. Then I was like, “Thanks, and who are you?”

 

“Oh, I’m no one important.”

 

I guess the look on my face freaked him out a bit cause then he was like, “I’m Joseph, please don’t kill me.”

 

I gave him an “Oh puh-lease, is that supposed to be funny” look, and he went back to normal, well at least it was normal to him, to me, it was like anything BUT normal, it was abnormal. You know the kind of abnormal that belongs in one of those white rooms with padded walls. So anyways then he was like, “I’m sorry that I startled you.”

 

“Startled me, oh no, you did no such thing, you just come out of a car, scare the crap out of me, and then offer me Sour Ice Breakers. Startling me means making me scream, and it takes a lot of work to make me scream.”

 

“Sorry, I’m just really good at scaring people.”

 

“Yeah, maybe if you stop wearing that suspicious tan overcoat, people won’t stare at you like you’re a murderer. The only way I know you’re not a murderer is because your name is Joseph. Joseph does not sound like a dangerous name. Sounds like the name of a guy that drives a school bus.”

 

“SHUT UP!”

 

After that there was another silent moment. I guess I didn’t take the “I’m going to kill you” face off yet because he was looking at me in a nervous way. He gave a shy smile. Those pearly whites nearly blinded me. I studied him a little more and found out he was a brunette. A cute brunette. I would have a crush on him if he wasn’t such a muscle man. He finally recovered after a minute. “So, what’s your name?” He asked. I was going to tell him but I didn’t really feel safe talking in the middle of the street. Joseph seemed to be pretty relaxed. He must’ve noticed me glance nervously at the hobo across the street.

 

After arguing about where to go we went to McDonalds. There wasn’t any communication on the way there. I think he was thinking of things to talk about because I know I was. When we got there we got into ANOTHER fight over who’s paying. I ended up paying for my own burger and he paid for his.

 

“So,” I said, trying to start a conversation. “What were you going to ask me in front of my apartment building?”

 

“You’ve forgotten already?”

 

“Yeah, I have a bad memory.”

 

“Okay, I was just asking for your name. You can remember what your name is, right?”

 

“Oh ha ha, very funny.  My name is Amanda, but you can call me Mandy. So what were you doing in front of my apartment building?”

 

“I accidentally got in my Mustang and drove to your apartment building. Then I accidentally git out the car and scared the crap out of you. I accidentally had mints. Then I accidentally started talking to you. Then I accidentally farted on you when you were thinking about stuff.”

 

“What was the last one again?”

 

“Nothing never mind.”

 

“Okay…WHY DO YOU LOOK SO FAMILIAR!?”

 

“Uh, because you saw me before.”

 

“Really, when?”

 

“Jeez, you really do have a bad memory. I’m the guy who had the pancakes and scrambled eggs with ketchup and OJ.”

 

“Oh yeah, you, now I remember you. I’m so sorry about the ketchup. I gave you the one with milk in it. Some dipshit kid found that funny.”

 

“So that’s why it tasted weird. I should throw up on you right now.”

 

“I was going to tell you but you finished your food before I could. I didn’t want to tell you then because I didn’t want you to throw because then I’m gonna throw up and then some other guy is going to throw up and I’m going to be the one with the mop.”

 

“Well, it didn’t taste that bad.”

 

“It was 5 weeks old.”

 

“Now that’s just gross.”

 

“That’s why I didn’t tell you.”

 

“You know, I was going to ask you out if the ketchup didn’t make me have to go to the bathroom.”

 

“You still could’ve came back and talk to me.”

 

“I was making up a cheesy pick-up line that I could use on you. Then I decided which one I was going to use the week after I ate the ketchup but when I got there they said you quit.”

 

“Oh yeah, I was looking for a job that an uneducated woman could get. I needed more money. I found a job at Club24.”

 

“That noisy place?”

 

Yeah, that noisy place…”

 

Then there was another silence. I finished my cheese burger in silence. Joseph just watched. It was kind of weird having a stare at you while you eat. When I finished I walked out the front door with Joseph by my side.

 

Joseph left me and ran to his car two minutes after we walked out the door. I was all alone and it really bugged me. Then when I’m like three blocks away from my apartment, a hobo came out of nowhere. I was used to fighting hobos. They are pretty easy to fight. I just did my usual “Scratch in the eye then throw on the floor and run” technique.

 

I can’t say it worked, but I can’t say it failed either. The scratching in the eye caught him off guard. He was covering his eyes and crying out in pain. But when I went for his neck, he grabbed my head and threw me on the floor.

 

I was closing my eyes, not wanting to see what was going to happen next. When I didn’t feel anything harm me I opened my eyes and saw Joseph punching hobo-man in the face. Hobo-man got pissed when Joseph gave him an uppercut. Then Mr. Hobo bared his teeth and hissed. They were yellowish and surprisingly sharp.



© 2010 Blue Waffles


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Added on June 15, 2010
Last Updated on June 15, 2010


Author

Blue Waffles
Blue Waffles

Pennsylvania, PA



About
We are the weird friend who have decided to make writings together. Rachel, aka me, is writing this because LiLy would make it sound retarded. Okay well I am 12 and LiLy is also 12 but her birthday is.. more..

Writing
Preface Preface

A Chapter by Blue Waffles


BOB BOB

A Chapter by Blue Waffles