Ode To An Aramark Bagel

Stale bagel. What can I say?

Oh my bagel, soft and round...
          thunk, thunk
Uh...firm and round...
          thunk, thunk, thunk
Well at least I got the round part down!

What do they make these things our of?
I stab it with my steely knife
                    Plastic!
          Whatever.
But I just can't kill the bagel.

Oh look! It's a bagel on a stick!
                    Plastic knife!
          What! Ever!
Where was I?
Oh yes,

Peel back the hard unyielding exoskeleton,
Expose the soft flesh
                    Bagels gots flesh?
          This one does...
                    Oh.

Microwave till warm and chewy...
Too much!!
Damn...
Not even cream cheese is gonna fix this...