Too Late

Your decisions can change everything

I was always late
For you
And I never rushed, never thinking I had to
Time stalked me like a wasp
I floated through life as if on a cloud
Thin air masking my mistakes
I was as elusive as life gets
Time meant nothing
And I'm sorry for this
I'm so sorry for this

I met you on a corner
Bitter weather battering your cheeks
Blue eyes sparkling under a mass of dark hair
You had waited an eternity there
We drank coffee on a bench
Mapping out the stars until dawn seeped in
As all thoughts provoked a certain clarity
You decided it would only ever be me
Always me
And I'm not sorry

I was late to the airport
Flying to Naples, no more planes for days
It had been years since you'd seen your family
So I watched as frost lay like icing over your dream
We played with silence like a toy for two weeks
And I'm sorry for this

The day of your parting
An hour of snow lay around your feet
A car skidded, you landed on the bonnet
I should of been there
I was at home reading an article
As your heart beat for the last time at the hospital
I should of been there holding your hand
Telling you I loved you
So I missed your departure too
And I am sorry
So sorry

Time is muffled
Churches like conveyer belts for the dead
As babies join this world
People leave it
The hurse shot to the Church like a police car
I imagined it having flashing blue lights
Saying he's dead, he's dead
And I am too
I was late for your funeral
I'm not sorry for this
It was something I couldn't bare to do

But we're you aware
The later I was
The longer I had you
You always calling
Where are you
Where are you
The longer you were in this world
Even if I wasn't next to you
The longer I loved you
The longer I knew you
The later I was
The longer you were in this life
Not rushing out of it
The longer I had you
And I'm not sorry for this
I'll never be sorry for this