A Personality Problem

disguised as a substance abuse problem (a tribute to david foster wallace)

"one, more, last time"
casually calm

in the middle of an addiction 

relentless,

protruding but not moving

seeing, 

but not really feeling

very human. . .
"one, more, last time"
on another marijuana vacation
"i will not come back,
after this"
i said to myself
as i say to myself
"one, more, last time"
again and again
across a spectrum
of abuse so large
i cannot even realize
ever even one time
in the moment
the behavior from the substance

until i finish, 

. . .

"one, more, last, time"

in that, i know

i will always come back

i realize this,

intimately,

before i forget. . .

"one, more, last time"

addicted to myself

all over again,

i cannot remember . . .

how the substance 

is the byproduct

of a personality - that's f*****g toxic

in the middle of a drawn out suicide

"one, more, last, time"

i said to myself

as i say to myself

one, more, time. . .

until i forget

for the last time

Author's Note

Reviews

[Tara Marie]

Yes this poem speaks of the truth. One more last time. Is never enough. N it's funny how soon. One forgets.

I like ur view. N how u write.

[grimfukle]

Excellent read.
I like the version of Heroin better off the Rock n Roll Animal album tho.

[Davidgeo]

I could agree with that. But that version's kinda long... and not really what I wanted the reader to focus on. I'm just happy you enjoyed reading it. I miss Lou Reed.

[Davidgeo]

… but not nearly as much as I miss David Wallace