BPM 37093

a white dwarf made of nothing but carbon is a really big diamond

survival through disaster
a trillion little ruins
shattered back together

reinvented again

by way of disaster

and again

survival under pressure
from a trillion little ruins
tortured into a trillion little places 

becoming something

stronger from the pressure

what turns things into treasure

from any trillion little ruins
it's the pressure that does shape us

perhaps diamonds last forever

maybe some things aren't forgotten 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

this is beautiful. A treasure is in my eyes some old person who has lived a long time is at peace with God and themself has lived the life they want to their finest capacity that they could do under the circumstnces, is happy in life, is thankful for what they have has no regrets lived life without hurting too many people, intentionally anyway, has lived a treasured life will look back on their life at their deaths moment and say wow thanks for all that now on to the next chapter of their life. thats a treasure i want not many can achieve, i loved your poem it shows the diamond cut fromthe stone, weathered in life to become a beautiful soul

[Davidgeo]

God is the devil. It works together. We just don't know any better.

[Nipplegrinder]

Nicely penned. Contemplative.

[Davidgeo]

The title of this is the "name" of star with the spectral properties of an extremely dense white dwarf made of mostly crystalized carbon... which essentially means it's a giant diamond surrounded by an "ocean" of electrons. It's been nicknamed "lucy" for obvious reasons (obvious if youre beatles fan anyway).


Thanks for the review nips... it's been a while. How have you been?

[Andrea Greene]

This is absolutely beautiful and empowering, but it still has the rugged feel of ordeals to it. I loved all of these lines individually and together you have created a masterpiece. 10/10. I love this.

[Davidgeo]

Thanks Andrea. I'm happy you liked it.

[drew garner]

I like this one but the overly positive outlook of the last line reminded me of Alphaville's song forever young. It is good overall just find the whole "love on the battlefield" tone of the piece made me think it was immature. But most of my poetry is porn in rhyme and meter so I really can't say I didn't like it.

[Davidgeo]

"love on the battlefield" tone? "overly positive outlook"? What the f**k are you talking about dude?

This is about how pressure makes things strong... you know, kinda like how diamonds are formed from extreme pressures compared with how strong personalities are formed from extreme situations. In terms of an outlook, it's pretty neutral and in terms of "love", um … I don't know what you were reading. I don't think you actually read things before you review them, maybe a few lines but I'm guessing you went with the "love" thing because you saw the ring in the picture. The actual words underneath make no mention, overtly or otherwise, about "love". Yeah... I'm pretty sure you don't read most of the things you review. You suck dude. Seriously... you need to try harder to cover up the fact that aren't reading what you're reading.

[Austin_Meehan]

Hahahahaha, I have no clue what he is speaking of either, but I wouldn't trip over it. Don't argue with an idiot because he will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. Best to just let it go. I will leave my review within this comment too.

This piece was really good, the idea of capturing how somebody (or something like the diamond you mentioned) can harden under pressure is one that is difficult. A very complex idea to grasp and yet you're doing a great job at understanding how pressure (might I say adversity in an environment) causes change. I do wish the piece was a little longer and that is only because there is a lot of repetition for a small piece; while it doesn't take away from the poem, it doesn't add a whole lot. Otherwise, I enjoyed it and it was a overall great piece. Best of luck!

[drew garner]

"love on the battle field." is a metal gear solid reference lol not that video games cant be poetic i just find that they have a tinge of irony to buffer there pretensions. overly positive could have been better said as naive or straining the idea in the piece that under pressure things always turn out beautiful just kind of seems to me very idealistic... unless of course it wansn't a metaphor and you just wrote a poem about the beauty of precious stones.

[drew garner]

also before you go one with what does metal gear solid have to do with the poem...it really doesn't it's just your poem reminded me of a cheesy speech Otacon gave about... love on the battlefield lol I know it was random as hell I just thought the poem was cheezy like Otacon monologue...though I haven't played the game in like a decade., so I could be remembering it wrong lol anyways I was just saying it was a little idealistic and cheezy.

[drew garner]

one final thing the alaphaville reference is to there song forever a very cheesy idealistic song. and it has the line "diamonds are forever." I know you probably haven't heard it but any one thinks how pressure makes precious stones is a complex metaphor is ether lying or ignorant of how common it is. in other words it is what we like to call a cliche.

[Davidgeo]

Okay then.