Stink Tree

I am a stink tree

Full of knots and distortions

You cannot build a house from me

Lumberjacks don't even look at me

Strong and weight bearing but unfit

          To build a home

I am a stink tree

I grow alone

          Strong

But of no use to any structure known

I am a stink tree

You cannot use me

Author's Note

Reviews

[LKBillips]

This trees gonna run the forest since no one wants to cut it down. Booyah!

[Jes' Pi]

Hello.

I will begin with the idea of the poem: Theoretically, it is a good idea, but practically, it didn't turn well. First, I'm confused about the personage your poem outlines: A person or an abstract tree?If the poem is a metaphor itself, I think you should use at least one human element for the reader will know what the poem describes. If the poem is the image of a real and usual tree, then you should rewrite the text because honestly, it is fairly dull. When you describe something, you have to make the subject seem fascinating, shocking, supernatural, even if the subject is just a scrawny tree that mourns in the middle of a glamorous forest. The description is really important because it outlines the subject's personality that leads to the poem's message and if the reader doesn't understand the poem's meaning, everything is useless.

About grammar:
The first, seventh and eleventh verses: The correct form is "stinking tree" not "stink".
The third verse: The word "from" wasn't used correctly because it isn't usable for the context. You should replace the word "from" with the verb "using" (You cannot build a house using me).

In conclusion, you need to work more. I confess that I am sure that you imagined an inspiring idea but you didn't express it well. Try to use more expressive words (use a thesaurus). There is a poet inside everyone, just work and give yourself time.
Good luck!

[Davidgeo]

The poem should be whatever you chose it to be. Abstract? A person? Well, all that's up to you. If I was completely transparent about that it wouldn't really be a poem, it would be prose. What this means to me doesn't have to be the same for you and vice versa... that is one of the wonderful perks of having an independent mind in regards to literature (especially poetry).

It seems that you have never heard of a "stink tree" before. I used the phrase quite correctly. It's an actual name for an actual thing.... AKA a "ghetto palm" or "tree of heaven" or more specifically known as Ailanthus Altissima. It's an actual plant from Australia and the southern United States. You should look into to stuff like that before just assuming an error.

To be frank, I really don't think you have an effectively working grasp on the English language, vocabulary, or the concept of abstract poetry in general. Perhaps English is your second language. It seems like you know some of the rules but have blinders on in terms of artistic improvisation.

In conclusion, if you are going to leave detailed reviews you might want to have a solid grasp on the content first. There simply isn't an effective reviewer in all of us, sorry.

[Jes' Pi]

Hello.

Yes, English is my second language and I don't think that is a problem.

If English is your first language, you should write better poems.



I think readers should know the terms you use without searching them on the internet. That's why writers usually don't use terms like that.



It's all your opinion. Nobody is perfect and we all have to work more.



I wanna remind you that you requested my opinion, so you read my opinion.
You don't have to say sorry, it's still my opinion. And I don't think I have to say sorry too.

[Davidgeo]

"If English is your first language, you should write better poems." Ha... yeah... totally objective assessment. (that was ad hominin, grow up). Just because I occasionally send read requests doesn't mean I have to blindly take a clearly flawed critique. I understand you may be upset but nothing I said was unreasonable or meant to personally attack you. You might wanna look in the mirror a little deeper, I don't think you are being honest with yourself. Passive aggressive BS like you just responded with is one of the more pathetic ways to respond to me.

[Davidgeo]

At least you know what a Stink Tree is now. Hopefully.

[Jes' Pi]

I was objective. It is a dull poem. I think I read that kind of poems for one million times in here and I am already bored. I may be a part of your audience, so you should expect from people to have similar opinions like mine.
However, I'm glad that I reviewed your poem and that I made everything clear.
Thank you.

[Davidgeo]

Aww... I think I hurt her feelings. It's painfully obvious why you are reacting the way you are. I only pretend to be immature - you actually are. You'd be wise to stop talking now, you're only going to further embarrass yourself.

[Hebe]

Reading this verse my mind associated it with a person's character, metaphorically it creates a visual of a person who stand's alone and knows his own strengths and weaknesses!

[Davidgeo]

Something like that. It also speaks to uselessness; which may or may not be one of those weaknesses.

[Nipplegrinder]

This stinks to high heaven. Trees don't stink.

[Davidgeo]

Trees don't stink? Are you sure? Hmm... I don't think you get out enough son.

[Nipplegrinder]

F****n witcha.

[Davidgeo]

F**k Wichita

[AYVID N]

Interesting. I googled it. Smells like semen lol. Grows rapidly and displaces more desirable trees. No surprises. It's basically Chinese. :) It does seem to have some remedial uses. Doesn't everything & everyone?

[Davidgeo]

It's not about that. I really didn't want to post this because it's so similar to "the useless tree" interpreted by Thomas Merton from Chuang Tzu who wrote his version about a thousand plus or so years ago. It's extremely different but the theme is not. Derivative and unoriginal are words you could use in regards to this. I'd leave a link but I still use books for this s**t... google "the useless tree".... you will see, I'm kind of a s****y writer.