Jazz on Your Face

All them notes we don't play.... God damn that Keyser Söze

Yeah, I'm so advanced I breed spice packets inside me animals

So we can just eat them as is

Like we used to

So, I'm so new; I found a way to make the little things re suprise themselves

So we can just be enthralled

Like it used to be

But, sometimes I get so worried about forgetting where I came from I stop talking

So I can just take it in

Like we were never made to do

Before,

-then now-

,and

After

At some point;

I hear you learn a secret

It's, still a secret...so (whisper);

- we were never made for any of it

-Just because of it

.Like an echo

Of a whisper.

(And then it's gone)

Author's Note

Reviews

[Reed Marcotte]

I have to be honest. I was a little puzzled as I read this one. I was afraid to comment thinking I'd be way off track, so yeah, that's pretty cowardly. I read a few other comment first to see what others took from it. The Truth is, I imagined Adam and then Eve as I read. Like thousands of years had gone by or something. Weird, I know. But I think this piece does cover the whole spectrum of time. pretty cool

[Davidgeo]

I'm glad you enjoyed it. I've been meaning to be more direct and obvious, half the time I forget what my own s**t means after a few weeks.

[Davidgeo]

I read your review again. You're not so far off, it is about something initial and primal, adam and eve like in essence. I'm not religious but, this was about the origin of something for sure. Sorry about giving you a worthless response before. Lets pretend I was busy.

[Ohioman]

If you were to ask me, they will get that prick sooner or later... if he really does exist.

[Davidgeo]

He doesn't. He's a real f*****g a*****e if does.

[Ohioman]

That's for sure.

[Nessly]

Are you talking about living in the moment because tomorrow isn't promised? I'm not sure I interpreted this accurately so correct me if I'm wrong, but this is what I took away from it. In any case, it's an awesome poem and I enjoyed reading it.

[Davidgeo]

Sort of. A less individual sense of it though. It's been a while since I wrote this but I think it's more likely about a species becoming too self involved and introspective that over generations they eventually forget their evolutionary origins and become confused with their own instinctual behaviors, they then spending lifetimes trying to remember why and what our instincts really mean . If you believe in creationism this poem will not make any kind of sense; the end is direct a reference to evolution and extinction.

[Nessly]

Oh, I love it even more now that you've explained it to me. Reading back over it, I can see a direct correlation in our own society with what you've stated above. This is definitely a masterful piece. I love your work.

[Davidgeo]

thanks dawg

[justdandy]

Revise the first 2 lines to "Yeah, I'm so advanced I breed spice packets inside my animals
So we can just eat them as it is."

Other than that, it looks okay.

[Davidgeo]

I like where you're coming from, I really do. I'm on board with that completely... but... I wrote this b***h a certain way, the current way sounds better out loud and adheres to kinda sorta to a loose structure I have.

For what it's worth I agree with you but I cannot change it for that reason.

Other things would need to be changed... that's a lot of fuggin work mate

[justdandy]

Interesting. I understand tho.

[Davidgeo]

Is it? Only if you articulate it. Isn't that the ultimate purpose of what we are supposed to be doing here?

Articulating things we can't, or choose not to, share elsewhere?

I'm jesus aka the devil what's the difference? (that last line meant nothing, I just thought it sounded funny)
scotch whisky

[Davidgeo]

PS. If you don't specify... you get gibberish from me. I can't be sweet but at times, an awful fugging monster. Just awful.

[Davidgeo]

(edit) - I can be sweet... Not, '' I cant be sweet "

I'm delicious. And that's your problem.

[justdandy]

It is not that funny. You have an interesting sense of humor, Hans.

[justdandy]

I believe delicious is not in my taste. If you were something else than delicious, then I would probably consider you...

[Davidgeo]

It really is, THAT funny.

"if I'm the only one laughing... I win"
Dougy Stanhoped

[Davidgeo]

Ha.. a******s; Have you ever considered, just for a moment... I would never consider you?

The female hubris... I love it. Because it fuggin hate me and my tribe... tribe dick and balls... aka (we just wanna bang).... Residing in the "Wate un See" tribes' hunting ground. You owe me $50 and not a dime less.

I refuse to edit the words in this review comment

[justdandy]

Hans, sometimes a little flirtation in your life wont hurt.

[Davidgeo]

Flirtation is worse than masturbation. No one gets off.

[TL Boehm]

I hesitate being the first reviewer. Oh well.

But I get so worried about forgetting where I came from I stopped talking
So I could just take it in
Like we were never made to do

This is deep. I imagine you'll quip about pirates but you are a poet. That there proves it.

[Davidgeo]

No. This was not about pirates. Not today.