What color are his eyes? I honestly don't know. Green I
suppose. Maybe blue. All that matters is that they are the most gorgeous eyes
I've seen. I could get lost in them, which is perhaps my new greatest weakness.
And his hair is a sandy shade that sometimes seems a little reddish, sometimes
more brown, which is also quite fine by me. And the way he looks at me makes me
feel like the most gorgeous, wonderful girl alive. Ah he's attractive. His
looks distract me like nothing else.
But the thing about him that really makes me crazy for him
is the way he brings out happiness in others. When we are out and about
wherever, he makes the cashiers and my family and just about everyone else so
smiley and cheerful - God knows I wish that I was like that. To have that effect
on people....he is my inspiration. And God also knows that that's exactly the
way he made me feel that one day in August. I was a college freshman, scared
and alone, and he was the only person that talked to me that day. It wasn't
until a few weeks later that I realized I was falling for him. But being the
shy girl I am I brushed it off as my new-girl-on-campus crush. We drifted and
it hurt terribly. I never got over him. But then that fateful day in May, that
day of misunderstandings, led me back to him. And now it's as if we've been
together forever. I let him in on my secrets and my weaknesses -and maybe that
will backfire, but it sure feels right to me. Not much more I can do but go on
my feelings.
And I'd be lying if I said he didn't have somewhat of a
"Past". But I'm not perfect and I have made mistakes, ones I regret
an am not particularly proud of, and I think we are both older and wiser and
all the better for it.
I know it won't be perfect. I know I'm still on a
new-relationship-high. I know I fall too easily. Man do I fall too easily. And
I'm easily hurt and believe me it scares the crap outta me. But this guy makes
me happy. And I think I deserve that with what I've been through. And he
deserves happiness after what he's been through. And I pray each day that that
peace and joy is never taken from either of us.
I know this is personal. I know I talk about myself too
much. I just love to share my happiness. And I need to release my strong
feelings onto paper or screen or what have you. He will probably never hear
these kinds of words from me. I'm just too shy and reserved. I just wish he
could know how I feel. I really hope he knows how lucky and proud I feel to
call him mine. Ah he's a special one.