A Drop In The Ocean

 

A drop of me in the ocean of you,

I drowned in the summer of eighty-four.

In the rose of pink and the sky of blue,

I opened myself as you closed the door.

 

I dared to dance on the edge of your name

and struck my heels against the setting sun

as the stem of innocence burst in flame

and two hearts for a moment beat as one.

 

I caressed the curve of your dimpled smile

and attentively gazed into your eyes

so still in the moment, so breathless, while

my heart was suffused with euphoric sighs.

 

There was blood in the sky and Purple Rain

and sad doves crying who suffered with ease

whose tear-stained wings were uplifted in vain

beneath the shadow of tenebrous trees.

 

The fireflies flickered, and we watched their light.

They numbered the pages of poetry.

I flowered beside you the palest white

never knowing you were a part of me.

 

After all these years, I am haunted still,

haunted by sweet, suffering devotion.

Though I wish it, I do not have the will

to be more than a drop in your ocean.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Such angst in this one...and a bittersweet beauty that just won't quit. I feel this as a piece looking back; reimagining and reliving that which as already been. I tend to do this quite often, and sometimes I find that in doing so I am left a little raw and worn out. This is very relatable, and I love the imagery that you've used in this one. Nicely done.

[icelandicblue]

There is a longing and a sadness in this piece despite the beautiful imagery you have crafted. Perhaps the sorrow stems from such imagery that could only be shared for a short duration and then was washed away by the tide and that drop could never really be united with the original ebb and flow because it has moved beyond the shore line. I love the beauty and sadness in this stanza:

The fireflies flickered, and we watched their light.
They numbered the pages of poetry.
I flowered beside you the palest white
never knowing you were a part of me.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Thank you. It's funny that you pulled out that one stanza. We were actually at the drive in theatre watching the movie, 'Purple Rain." As we were sitting outside, fireflies were everywhere. I'll never forget the moment. Only then, I never realized that all these years later that it would be such a memorable moment for me. My younger sister at the time asked him, "How do they light up like that?" He replied, "They carry around little matches." LOL! I just thought he was so sweet to respond to her in that way, and I've never forgotten it. He truly is the only man that I have ever loved, and that love haunts me daily.

Thank you again for the kind review.

[Sarai Lee]

I really love the lyrical ebb and flow of this. I love the song quality and the heartache that is so perfectly timed. I can almost hear the music to it. Your images are simple and beautiful. You conjure up the pain of lost love, and the ocean of loss. We have all loved and lost in some way, and being "haunted" by it years later is something that few of us can escape. You capture that feeling beautifully. Well done!

[Mark]

och..."...the pangs of despis'd love ..."
Though it were in a minor key, the strains of a woman's song pleading for her lover to show forth is an old and a sad song. You have captured the delicate balance of desperation and hope so beautifully here. Lines like "A drop of me in the ocean of you", and, "I dared to dance on the edge of your name" betray your identity of that saddest of injustices, defining one's self in terms of his acceptance, which is a tragic, if ubiquitous, waste.

[Relic]

This is impressive writing.

Interpretation 1

It would appear to me the speaker is remembering a special time when her innocence was lost to someone who overpowered her with an influence of sensual strength. The fourth stanza would appear to be a confirmation of innocence lost.

"I flowered beside you the palest white never knowing you were a part of me." The first, is always the one women remember most as I've been told. The last stanza seems the saddest of all. With such devotion, he will probably only think of her now and then as just another short fling.

Interpretation 2

She fell for him that summer but despite her affection, he never felt the same or it never worked out. Years later, she still remembers him but only as a lost love. Somewhere inside her, she never had the self-esteem or self-worth to chase someone so far out of her league. To this day, it still haunts her.

Despite any errors in either of my interpretations, this is still a fine poem with a poetic quality that stands out.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Thank you for your lengthy and interpretive review. This poem is actually about my first and only love --- a high school love that reblossomed thirteen years later, only to be closed by me. He had too much baggage and too many other priorities in his life to make a place of importance for me, despite his coming back into my life of his own volition. Although I loved him beyond measure, I loved myself enough to know that I would rather be first best to myself and be alone, than be with him and feel second best. Now, years later, he come back into my life, calls, and has moved closer. I, however, will not allow myself to dance with him again. The love has never disappeared, I have just accepted that it has always been the wrong time for us. I love him still.

[Relic]

You're welcome. You're a very strong person to avoid that kind of closeness even though the feelings are strong.

[Coyote Poetry]

A sad and beautiful poem. The ocean is my favorite place. Can be very dangerous for the inexperience swimmer. The strong description took me to sad thoughts and places.
"There was blood in the sky and Purple Rain
and sad doves crying who suffered with ease
whose tear-stained wings were uplifted in vain
beneath the shadow of tenebrous trees."
I like the complete poem. The above lines were my favorite. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Neville]

Hey LMVT & so you should be justifiably proud of this beautiful piece of literary art that you have not only created but also made available for the whole world to enjoy.

I am sure that I will re-visit this work of yours time & time again & you are quite right in suggesting that poetry is the sister of Sorrow but it is also the partner of salvation...
All good Things,

Neville

[Chris]

The counts were right but the tones jarred... strange.

[Gleb Zavlanov]

I am lost for words! This is an incredibly beautiful, melodious yet plaintive poem. Your imagery was great and I was engaged throughout the entire read. Bravo!

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Thank you, Gleb. I've been on hiatus for a while and was really proud of this newly constructed poem. I appreciate the feedback. :-)

[thespaceinmybed]

This has great flow. A great read and so descriptive. I like how the ending ties back to the beginning.