A Drop In The Ocean

 

A drop of me in the ocean of you,

I drowned in the summer of eighty-four.

In the rose of pink and the sky of blue,

I opened myself as you closed the door.

 

I dared to dance on the edge of your name

and struck my heels against the setting sun

as the stem of innocence burst in flame

and two hearts for a moment beat as one.

 

I caressed the curve of your dimpled smile

and attentively gazed into your eyes

so still in the moment, so breathless, while

my heart was suffused with euphoric sighs.

 

There was blood in the sky and Purple Rain

and sad doves crying who suffered with ease

whose tear-stained wings were uplifted in vain

beneath the shadow of tenebrous trees.

 

The fireflies flickered, and we watched their light.

They numbered the pages of poetry.

I flowered beside you the palest white

never knowing you were a part of me.

 

After all these years, I am haunted still,

haunted by sweet, suffering devotion.

Though I wish it, I do not have the will

to be more than a drop in your ocean.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

The poem is all beautiful and so does the end. Nice work!

Though I wish it, I do not have the will
to be more than a drop in your ocean.

[David Lewis Paget]

You write these so well, Linda Marie, they are so musical in their form that they sing to me, and take me away, on first reading, from the comprehension of what you are writing. I have to read them twice. I wouldn't dare criticise this piece, except for one minor 'clunk' in the final line. I thought it stopped short, three syllables short in fact. 'To be more than a drop in your 'bottomless' ocean.' was the thought that occurred to me. Whichever way, I love it.

[Ian Gilmour]

I was hooked at the very first line and will remain hooked long after. The imagery, word choices, the idea which drives the poem and the spirit one can feel in your words all come together in a fluent, honest, beautiful work.

[Forest Green]

Brought the point of climax at the final line, much like an artist knows when the painting is complete. It is said that a piece of writing is never finished but abandoned, however this is disproven here. The summation is an expression, an expanse, an absolute period.

Stanzas do not collide, but hold hands and the lines of special emphasis are numerous. Much like a dream that catches the mind but not the memory, this catches the heart without the pain of destitution. For it gives at the end.

Fantastic.

[Dean]

I don't remember if I've said it before, but your metaphor is so very arresting! Never even the hint of cliché, but presented so unassumingly and appropriately, that one is tempted to believe that you naturally think that way! You are much more than a drop in MY ocean, you are a tidal wave. How great to be in touch again.

[Luke Masters]

Beautiful, as always.
I'm writing this line, because the comment box is making me add extra characters. Ignore it.

[ANM]

Very nicely put together, I enjoyed reading it very much!

[Adam Whitworth]

you do write very well, much appreciated lines, keep it up :)

[Frieda P]

You had me with that opening line, this is utterly gorgeous and bittersweet reminiscing. Too many great lines to pick just one, I enjoyed it beginning to end, sad dove sigh. Outstanding read.