Lost Words

Inside a single burst

A flash of diamond light

stands the deliverer of truth you set!

though you walk you see quite well

with eyes so firmly closed

 

Now iv'e lost that foolish noun,verb and verse

now anger once controlled has fled

all my words in chaos lay

syntax lost in spinning spirals of synchronized synapsis

 

Nails driven hard and deep

where now is the light you keep?

hidden away for another day

or lost in syncopated rhyme

 

Author's Note

Format was also lost after the first line, no idea why, stupid pc

Reviews

[Ms. Gruye]

"Now iv'e lost that foolish noun,verb and verse"-- I liked that line, it was very telling of how anchored the narrator is on things that are written or mapped out. . I would suggest removing the exclamation mark from line three, it didn't read as an exclamatory statement, instead a subtle insight o carry with me through the rest of the poem.

Thanks for posting.

viva la

[Robin]

not a derailed train of thought but one sitting in the yard awaiting destination .

[Art Sun]

Lost...even within our own thoughts we find truth that is which we seek and though we can escape into the depths of our own...there is still that lost sensation...nice work

[.]

This is quite a wonderful write here. I enjoyed reading this.

[Jasmine]

this is wonderful, I like the abandonment of all clear structure (it's what I do best!) but you've kept some lovely alliteration for all the "puritans" out there ;-)

[J.M]

I love it - totally original and completely ingenious. The change of format also adds to that. Nice work.

[Drake Ryder]

Wonderful work...

[Lovely Lady]

"though you walk you see quite well
with eyes so firmly closed"
Very rich and deep in colors, hidden meanings and emotion.... i want more of this.... it will find you again and be right before your open eyes.
~lovely

[Wondering Mind]

to serah: words always have a way of their own, force them, and they fade like flowers
now the write, this, my friend, deserves one of my infamous "wonderful write", often repeated, but sincere.