Funny 3

Jokes from television programs I watch.

This mother had two young boys that were known for their mischievous behavior. Any time trouble occured  they were certain to be a part. She decided to take them to see the pastor one at a time to see if he could help. The pastor asked the first little boy.“Where is God?” He sat there silently. The pastor asked again. “Where is God?” Still no reply. He asked a third time. “Where is God?” The boy then bolted out the door and ran home to his brother. He said, “God is missing and they think we did it.”

An elderly couple was sitting on the front porch celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. The husband, feeling romantic, said to his wife, “Honey our love is tried and true.” The wife had difficulty hearing it and he said again, “Honey our love is tried and true.” Again she did not understand what he said. Finally he screamed, “Honey our love is tried and true.!” She replied, “well fine, I am sick of you too.”

This elderly lady went to church and the usher asked her where she wanted to sit. She replied that she wanted to sit in the front row. He said “Oh no, you don’t want to sit there. Our pastor is boring and will put you to sleep”. The elderly lady asked, “Do you know who I am?” No, he replied. “I am the pastor's mother.” He asked, “Do you know who I am?” She said, "no." He said, “Thank God.”

This woman had three sons that came into a lot of money. One son bought his mama a house and one son bought his mama a car. The other son knew his mama loved reading the Bible but had trouble reading. So he bought his mama a talking parrot that could read. Months later she wrote to her first son saying the house was too big. The second son, she said the car was too small. The third son she said you present was better than all of them. The chicken was delicious.

These two men, a pope and a lawyer died on the same day and went to Heaven. They met at the gate and Paul said, “I gotta take you to your new home. The pope had this small house. One table and one chair. There was nothing to it. He took the lawyer to a different house. It was beautiful. Had a beautiful view, a swimming pool out back. The lawyer was overwhelmed. The lawyer asked, “why did i get such a beautiful place and the pope got such a small place. Paul replied, “we have lots of popes but you are our first lawyer”. 

Reviews

[emmajoygreen]

Isn't it wonderful how humour, fun. giggles, laughter and all gathers people to the fire side or in the sunshine to share something so important - time to strip off the blues and dance with rainbows. Many, many thanks for collecting and offering all these smile-a- minute gifts in what can be an often dark world, Linda

[Lorry]

The last one was a belter! 😊
Loved it!

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Funny
Enjoyed this thanks 🙏
Take care

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Yes they are funny, Some more than others. I have at least fifty more funny's to add. Right now I am working on a short story.

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Honestly, I am going to fix me a cup of coffee and go to bed....I hope.

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Ah coffee before bed
No I can’t drink that
At night

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Yes, I am like my father, I am a coffee drinking, I can drink it at night and still be able to go to sleep. I also wake up at 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning wanting more coffee.

[JE Falcon]

Woo, loved them all, Thanks!

[Ranger Kessel]

Very funny. Glad i stopped by.

[Chris Shaw]

You have a real gift for making laughter Linda. Best medicine you can get. All of these stories are very amusing. Have a good day.

Chris

[Temperance]

Hahahahaha!! Thanks for sharing these funny stories and bringing a chuckle to my day! Laughter is always great medicine! Temp

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Yes, that is so true. Laughter is good medicine. I have so many of them jokes to type and post but it will be awhile. I am working on another short story right now. i think maybe my writers block is coming to a end. I sure hope so. It has been years since I have had the motivation to write. I thought if I just kept writing something maybe it would motivate me. These jokes are medicine to me also. Thank you for your wonderful review. I will catch up with my reading soon. As long as my PC stays online.

[Temperance]

Praying for the Internet to stay active!!

[John the Baptist]

Humorous stories here. Especially liked the last one.

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Well thank you Mr. John. I am glad that you liked them. I am so many of them jokes that need to be typed up and posted. I seem to be having writers block forever now. I figure as long as I am typing something no matter what its is, it should give me some kind of motivation. And it is working I am now working on another short story. Take care my friend.

[Aura]

Haha another great funny write Linda! My favourite has to honestly be the first one! The pastor was simply asking a question "where is god?" But because of the boys wickedness, they automatically thought the pastor was accusing them of taking God. Lol that's funny! The last one I'd like to think the reason there was only one lawyer in heaven was because the other lawyers always defended the crooks that actually did do the things they were accused of! This lawyer was always on the right side of law! Haha thanks for sharing Linda!

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Yes that was my favorite about the boy and "Where is God." I thought that was so funny. Thanks for the review. I appreciate that. I will return the favor soon.

[Aura]

You are most welcome!

[Dave Brown]

good stuff
In spite of our recent interaction with a lawyer I give the big win to Mamma eating the Parrot
My understanding is that it is so hot down there she wouldn't have to cook it??

[Linda Stinson Wells]

Yes it is very hot here. It is 8:45 and it feels like 112 degrees about 30 minutes ago when I checked it. Thank you for the review. I will return the favor soon. At least as long as my internet stays on. I am not looking forward to the days when will be eating the parrots. Take Care My Friend

LSW