Up Here//Down There

“Wow.”

I don’t say it.

I breathe it.

Because it’s true.

And, for a moment in time,

It’s all I can think or say.

You’re beautiful.

I don’t say it.

Or breathe it.

But I know it’s true.

You.

The ninth cloud is already far beneath me,

Along with the tenth,

The eleventh,

Maybe even the thirteenth.

“Wow.”

I don’t even know how I got this far up.

But I’m loving it.

I’m loving

You.

“Don’t look down.”

It’s what they’ve always said at heights like these.

But everyone always looks down anyway.

I look down anyway.

“Wow.”

I don’t even know how I lasted a day down there.

But I’m glad we’re up here.

Me.

And you.

“Nothing lasts forever.”

What?

Some things do.

I’ll be up here forever.

Me.

And you.

But it seems the world doesn’t agree.

There’s a gust of wind,

And a crack of lightning.

And I’m falling.

We’re falling.

Me.

And Nav.

Author's Note

<3

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is a playful way to SHOW instead of tell (first rule of good writing!) I can picture everything, you make it so clear & visual. I love it when a writer takes a cliche idea (such as "being on cloud 9") and twists it into an original expression. This is so conversational, you really make us feel you're right there being a silly lovestruck ding-a-ling! *smile* Fondly, Margie

[The Iron Horseman]

Terrific, my friend. This expresses the entire range of emotions from initial infatuation to heartbreak incredibly well. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I particularly liked the following line:
'The ninth cloud is already far beneath me,'

Great stuff!

[Olivia Danielle]

This is very beautifully written, I could feel your emotions as I read this poem.

[Arriam]

I don’t even know how I lasted a day down there.

But I’m glad we’re up here.

Me.

And you.

“Nothing lasts forever.”

What?

Some things do.

Ohhhh my gosh I love this so much. You encapsulate that feeling of falling, good or bad, perfectly.

[Einstein Noodle]

ohhhhhhhhhhhh that first "true" love ...hang on ..its all one can do ...we rise to unseen heights ...disregarding any and all warnings or cautions ... weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh! ;) very clever word play in closing ... i read it as the fall being "in love" ... but my experience tells me it can be the more painful outcome ..love your poem ...drew me in and gave me a fine experience i had all but forgotten about

[Ghost writer]

that's REALLY cool, I love the implications, really sweet good energy, great work

[limoncello]

thank you!!