Silly

Another Poem, not sure if it's anything like my other one, hope you like it

They say my dreams are silly.

impossible and strange.

they say not to get my hopes up.

But despite that I always do.

Why does no one believe in me?

I don't care.

I believe in myself.

They only tell me my dreams are silly for their own amusement.

They like to crush me.

I don't care.

I know they're bitter.

Their dreams never came true.

They could never believe in themselves.

No one ever believed in them.

People liked to crush them, for their own amusement.

I should feel bad for them.

But.

I don't care.

 

Author's Note

I'm sorry if this is horribleee, i couldn't concentrate very well.

Reviews

[Gionelly Kiss]

Strong opening and strong ending. The firs lines flowed more and captivated and then forced the reader to face the to-the-point facts you presented. The last lines with a few words provided perfect emphasis and closure to your feelings. It was alright and not horrible. Keep it up. Thanks for sharing.
gionelly*Kiss

[GuineaPig]

good poem. i like how you convey the message. one little typo- 'I know their bitter'- i think you meant 'I know they're bitter'. :D otherwise, great work

[Obscure Meaning]

Brilliant use of full stops at the end of each line. Forcing the pause and making you think more about every line. In a way it allows the poem to be seen in a more dreamlike sense, with flickers of things and images.
Thanks for sharing :)

Obscureness out

[la Abeja]

this is good. you seem have a good concept of what you want to write about.

sometimes after i've written a draft that i like but don't love yet, i put it to the side and read it again another day. if i haven't looked at it in a while, sometimes i can think of a phrase or two that can be added or reworded.

you may be surprised what new experiences can do for an older poem.

great job. keep it up