What is a Midwesterner?

My dear pen pal,

In our last correspondence, you asked me what it means to be an American, and more specifically, what it means to be resident of the Midwest. In your country, you have very strong regional identities that you take great pride in, whether it be Bavarian, Northern German, or a citizen of the Rhine River Valley. All of these areas are contained within one nation: Germany. When introducing yourself to an American, you would say that you are German. You may include where in Germany you are from, but to most Americans it will make no difference. However, if you were to introduce yourself to another German, you would clarify your regional origins, and usually with great pride.
This behavior is similar here in the United States, for although we all identify as Americans, in this expansive and populated country we group ourselves with smaller communities, whether they be regional, political, or religious. Of particular commonality is the regional pride of United States citizens. Personally, I call myself a Midwesterner.
Geographically speaking, the Midwest is the region bordered by the Great Lakes in the north and etched out by the Ohio River to the east. Our western border is debatable, but typically defined as the far reaches of the Dakotas, Nebraska and Kansas. The Midwest is rich in farmland, water, and forests, and all of these factors contribute to the subculture that defines Midwesterners.
This subculture is an attitude and a stereotypical personality, though not one that we Midwesterners are ashamed of. Perhaps you’ve heard of “Minnesota Nice” or a Wisconsin accent. Maybe you’ve seen pictures of football or basketball games where people don hats shaped like blocks of cheese or corn cobs, and I wouldn’t blame you for laughing. See, we know we’re ridiculous! We sit in trees in bright orange snow gear and wait for a deer to show up...or not. Wisconsinites go to Packer games in snow, ice, or rain, and any Midwesterner will sit out in frigid temperatures on a frozen lake ALL DAY LONG if it means as much as one bluegill. We know that Saturday Night Live makes fun of our Public Radio announcers and their programs about muffins! We know our voices sound funny and our men have a lot of facial hair! We know all of these things, but we remain vigilant: we will not give up our flannels, our fish or our funny hats.
For all of our goofy customs, there is a solid and accurate opinion of Midwesterners: we are nice people. Our small towns are closely knit, our casseroles are damn good, and we know how to shovel a driveway. We’re hardy people who brave the coldest temperatures on a daily basis for sometimes as many as five months a year! We have some of the best state and private colleges in the United States. We’ve got strong, tree-choppin’, deer-shootin’, ice-fishin’ boys...and girls. You can take any one of us home to meet mom AND watch football with dad.
As you can tell, I take enormous pride in my Midwest heritage. There’s no place like this region, and that’s what makes it special. I hope this letter satisfies your curiosity about the lives of Midwesterners, and I look forward to hearing about any region that you identify with!
Can’t wait to hear from you,

your Midwestern Friend