Prologue G.G

Past

Carmen Alyliffe is a powerful witch in her prime, she has light brown hair with green eyes that capture the attention of every person she spoke with. Her sister Charlet Alyliffe is also a powerful witch in her own right, she has reddish hair with hazel eyes.

Carmen was asleep on her bed when she woke up in a cold sweet. “Oh God this is not good.” Carmen said getting up from her bed and going over to her sister. “Charlet wake up. We need to talk.” Carmen said moving to the kitchen.

Charlet woke up and followed behind her, “What’s the matter Carmen? Why did you wake me, so early?” Charlet asked.

“I just had a vision and we need to get mom and Brandon out of here before the sunrise and the day begins.” Carmen said passing the kitchen.

“Why do they need to leave town?” Charlet asked hoping that her sister * just had a bad dream.

“We don’t, but they do, now come on help me make something for them to take when they go.” Carmen started to move things around the kitchen the noise waking up their mother.

“You two should be sleeping we have a buzzy day ahead of us *.” Their mom looked at Carmen’s face. “Is it bad, Carmen?”

“Mama we do not have time for this. Just go and get your things and Charlet will get Brandon’s, you two need to leave before the sun comes out.” Carmen told her mom.

“Carmen Alyliffe * sit and tell me what is going on right know?!” Carmen’s mom demands waiting for an explanation.

“Fine,” Carmen said taking a pause, “I had a vision and we need to get you and Brandon out of here!”

“Well, you two will come with us so go get your things ready and we will start somewhere were nobody knows us.”

“Mama you know we cannot do that.” Charlet said. “We cannot change events that are meant to happen. That would be putting Bandon and you in danger.”

“I know but you two are my children I cannot just leave you.” Their mother said pulling both of them into a hug.

“Mama don’t worry. Everything is going to be fine. Now get your things together and go before daybreak.” Carmen said moving away from her mother and sister.

“Carmen, what is going on? Why is mom crying?” Brandon asked from the hallway.

Carmen moved to her brother and put her arm around him. “Brandon you and mama are leaving in a couple of hours.”

“Are you and Charlet coming with us?” Brandon asked.

“No, we are staying here, it’s just going to be you and mama.” Carmen said kneeling in front of him.

“Why aren’t you coming with us?” Brandon asked.

“We have to stay to protect the people from the town.” Carmen asked.

“Yes, I promise to protect mama.” Brandon said standing looking at his sister.

“Good now go to your room and change into some clothes, it’s almost time for you to leave.” Carmen said pointing Brandon to his room. He walked over as Charlet was coming out with a small bag.  

“Go on Brandon I left some clothes on your bed for you to change into.” Brandon went in while Carmen and Charlet waited for them.

When they were ready they went over to say their last goodbyes making their way out of town and out of danger.

Charlet look over at Carmen asking, “Now, What?”

“Now we act like nothing out of the ordinary is going on.” Carmen said walking back into their house.

 

Four hours later there was a knock at the door*, Carmen went to answer it. “Eva what brings you here today?” Carmen asked as she moved aside, “Come in.”

“No, I am not going in I just came to ask if you could meet me at the apple tree at noon I have something important to ask of you that we cannot speak of here.” Eva said looking nervously around her.

“Fine, we will meet you at the tree at noon.” Carmen said.

“I will see you then.” Eva said moving away from the house.

           

Carmen and Charlet were waiting for Eva next to the apple tree. They had been waiting for some time when finally she arrived.

“What took you so long?” Carmen asked looking at her friend.

“We have been waiting out in this * weather.” Charlet said looking at her suspiciously. Charlet did not trust easily and even less with Carmen’s visions.

“I had to wait until everything was settled.” Eva said looking at them. “I know that you two practice black magic but it has to stop a lot of people are getting hurt from it.”

“What are you talking about? We haven’t done anything.” Charlet said, her suspicion growing about this meeting.

“I know it was you. That hurt those children the other night, I saw you coming from the cemetery.” Eva said looking at them. Eva bends over and grabbed her stomach and started shouting. “I promise not to tell anybody just don’t kill me.”

“Are you okay?” Carmen asked moving toward her to help.

“No stay away from. I promise not to tell just leave me alone.” Eva said as she started to cry and move backwards away from them.

People from the town starting to come out from behind bushes and trees “Grab them!” One of the villagers said.

“Why? We haven’t done anything wrong!” Charlet said looking at them.

“Grab them and cover their eyes so that their devil worship witchery won’t work on us.” Frank the priest of the town said. He was a young man that had to work for the respect of the town’s people when he had first arrived at the village.

“We would like to know what we are being charge with.” Charlet said looking at each and every one of their captures.

“This town finds you guilty of the fallowing, practicing witchcraft on innocents and concerting with the devil. Your sentence is to hang.” The sheriff said.

“You all have got to be kidding. We have not done any of those things.” Charlet said angrily to the village people that had seen them grow up.

“We have witnesses’ and proof that you two have been practicing this evil witchcraft.” The priest said.

“You all have gone out of your minds.” Charlet said struggling to get lose.

“Take them to the tree, the rope is ready.” The Sheriff said motioning to the people that had them by the arm.

“For goodness sake Carmen, say something.” Charlet said turning to her sister.

“It’s no use they have chosen their path and our fate is sealed.” Carmen said looking over at her.

As they were putting the cloth over their eyes and the rope around their necks Charlet couldn’t believe what she was hearing from her sister. Carmen never gave up this easily. At that moment Charlet remember of the events that took place that afternoon. “We could have changed the outcome of what was going to happen you know if only you would have had more confidence in me and plan this out a little better.” Charlet said to her come with what was about to happen to her.

“You know we couldn’t. There is no way that you can stop death from arriving without exchanging somebody else life in exchange for yours.” Carmen said, “And you know perfectly well that I would never do that to another person.”

“I agree, but what are we going to do know we cannot let her get away with this.” Charlet said.

“Are you ready for our final incantation?” Carmen said looking over at her sister.

“As ready as I will ever be.” Charlet said.

Carmen started, “Your souls will be trapped in this village by the evil that has come into your hearts, but by our will we will be back and set you free.”

“Remove the stools!” Once the order was given and the girls were hanging their bodies moving gently back and forth the cloth from their eyes fell and you could see their eyes empty of life the wind pick up and the villagers silenced. There were no sounds to be heard anywhere in the village. The afternoon sun becoming a dark and cloudy day bringing with it darkness and rain.

 

That night you could hear anguish cries going true the village. The cries of anguish coming from two man that stood before the hanging bodies ran thru the village awakening the villagers that look true their windows and saw the dark skies thundering with lighting foreshadowing their future.

Reviews

[Emma Anderson]

Instead of telling readers she has brown hair try to fit it in with the story. For example,

Carmen woke in a cold sweat, her light brown hair stuck to her forehead. She pushed her hair back saying, "Oh god not this again" Her green eyes wide with fear.

Stories are much more interesting to read if you give the description and details about the characters as you go along rather than telling the audience, my character has brown hair green eyes and a sister. They are both witches.

I hope you can see how much more interesting you could make this and I hope this helps.

[Leticia]

Thanks I was looking for a way to change that but I was kind of stuck and didn't know how to rephrase the description to make it flow with the rest of the text.