Now I Know Why Californians Love the Ocean

This one is also in progress.

 You walk

warm sand, bare toes, down the beach

white foam nips you

and splashes

cold, cold,

but you go deeper

and with each step, warmer.

You realize

the water’s perfect

and you go deeper

and waves swim up, powerful.

They smack you down,

knock you off your feet,

then scoop you up again

and gently carry you

like a reprimanding mother

back towards the shore.

She drops you off, but you

fight your way out again

through the current

and foamy white surf.

Before you, a silky green wave

folds like a sheet

and just as it reaches you, you know

this is your wave.

The giant comes

you turn

and it envelopes you, engulfs you,

knocks your feet back, and throws you

up the beach

and you emerge

blinking in the sunlight

reflected glaringly off the waves.

You have been sharply scolded.

The salt water burns your throat.

You wade back up the beach

and take a drink

and sit on your towel

with the sand sticking to your feet

and you look out at the waves

and eat sweet, seedless

Nappa Valley grapes

large and round and shiny as a marble,

but you still can’t get the taste

of the ocean salt out of your mouth. 

Author's Note

It's really long. What should I cut out?

Reviews

[D.L. Simmons]

my suggestion for this is to keep it to the sand nipping at your toes and wading instead of getting enveloped...
and i love the grapes thing too :)
but hey...one person. get lots of opinions :)