You Can Be Mayor Too!

What Dr. Seuss might write about our wonderful drug culture.

�Drugs are just awful!� all your life you�ve been told.
�You�ll die when you�re young, you�ll never get old!
You�ll never go anywhere, there�s no job for you!�
But that�s not quite true, oh there�s lots you can do.

Do you want to play ball and make some sweet money
So you too can deal with some gold-digging honey?
To play like a pro you must train like one too.
Steroids just might be the ticket for you.
You�ll be strong as an ox and fit like one too,
You�ll be able to do things not many can do.
Of course there�s a catch in it for you I fear.
That �roid rage is something quite awful, I hear.
But just think of it � you�ll be the best in the biz!
If you don�t mind testicular shrinkage, that is.

Maybe sports aren�t your thing, maybe you like to joke.
The world is much funnier after one good long toke.
Marijuana�s the funniest; it�s cool, safe and fun.
So much can be written about the Pot-Things you�ve done.
Seth Rogan, James Franco, Chappelle, Jonah Hill,
If you don�t cash in these guys definitely will.
If you don�t want to make funny movies, so be it.
But a hit summer comedy awaits, I full guarantee it.

Stay-at-home-parent, is that what you said?
All that hard work and pressure might go to your head.
I hear Ritalin works, methamphetamines too.
Teeth are so overrated, don�t you thinks so? I do.
You�ll keep up with your kids and make lightning-fast rounds.
Added bonus for you, you�ll lose unwanted pounds.
You�ll still have the energy to keep your house clean,
But your life in the bedroom will suffer, if you get what I mean.

Domestic life not the right option for you?
You want to be someone we can all look up to.
Being mayor is one way to show you�re on track,
Unless you�re Marion Barry in which case, you smoke crack.
If you get it on tape, well then, kudos to you.
Just don�t let the press see it, who knows what they�ll do.

So the next time they tell you that, �You�re a big mess!
You�ll never be famous or big; a success.
You�re so irresponsible, a plague on this earth!
You will be one forever � you have been since birth!
You could end up a lowlife if you do what you do!�
Quite politely assure them, you could be Mayor too.

Reviews

[J. James Reider]

This is a good piece... it has the potential to be a great piece... let it mellow some... let it age and see what new things come up and as you get experiance writing you will really be able to turn this thing into a "homerun"! The more you write you will learn more about flow and meter, it already has a really good rhyme scheme and the sarcasm carries over to the reader very well.... Alot of people do not know who Marion Barry is, I think he is the Mayor of San Fran., but am not sure... so maybe substituting him for GB or Al Gore would go over better... just my opinion... Very interesting!

[N3v3r_2_L@t3]

Lol I love it. You put great feeling into it, and I love how you switched your words around in the lines to make the poem rhyme, but at the same time, making sure the reader understands what thier reading.

"Unless you're Marion Barry in which case, you smoke crack."

This would be my favorite line, lol, it cracked me up. This poem portrays the lives of most of us out there, doing drugs and what not. I don't know if you are trying to be sarcastic, or funny, but this poem is both. You did a great job, keep it up, and welcome to writer's cafe=] If you have anymore writing, please send it to me, I would love to hear more from you. You seem like a very talented writer. =]