Thanatos (a rhyme not a poem)

Here's what an angst sophomore is capable of writing.

Thanatos

This note I write to ease the pain.

For only then  might I refrain

From this sin, this calloused upstart

That tears as well as mends my heart.

But in my bowels the truth bids, no.

There’s only left one way to go.

In torment, so, I sit this night

Assured the only end in sight.

My head grows light, I stay my fall.

Once more I answer whiskey’s call.

Oh, how the golden liquid fails

As my dishonor sets new sails

And forces me the need to kneel,

To bend to God for some repeal.

Instead, I pray to stone faced beasts

Now watching over saintly feasts

Where heads on collared necks are bent

In artificial sacrament,

Give me halt this quest, though just.

But silent words tell me I must

Through agony and pain prevail

Until at last this scarlet grail,

This terror filled unworthy goal

That robs the future of my soul,

Is done - this cruel and sickened scheme.

If only this were but a dream.

I rub my eyes in hopeful thought,

Though augury has given naught,

To she who could this task dispel,

Within whose arms my soul could dwell,

If only for a little time

To shield me from this feckless crime,

To lift me from this wicked keep

And turn me from this final sleep.

So little heed I gave her calls

That begged me quit the darkened halls

Where I drank deep the worldly wine,

Cleverly losing what had been mine.

Time after time she called my name

Bringing upon her all my shame,

Until, at last, she took her leave,

Leaving me to sit and grieve.

But quickly I must turn away

From cheerless thoughts of yesterday.

What’s done is done. The night grows chill.

It is the time - the time to kill.

To lay to rest, before the dawn,

Him who became the devil’s pawn,

Him whose tears have all been shed

Recounting years now long since dead.

Dead the way he, too soon, shall be.

Dead without balm of Galilee.

So it is I bid all farewell

As I go find my place in Hell.

Reviews

[David Scott]

I found this less angst and more resolute despair... A strong and obtuse write.