The Dancer

The Dancer

A Poem by Elaine

Colors flash

as I dance

perfect rythem

unbreakable stance

 

limbs extend

to the sky

I jump, I leap

I dance to fly,

 

Audience watching

don't miss a beat

"beautiful" they think

what a nice little treat...

 

never knowing

I don't dance to entertain

my soul and my spirit

are the things that are pained.

© 2010 Elaine


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Reviews

Firstly, be consistent with your capitalization. If you capitalize the first letter of two stanzas, the other two really should be capitalized as well.

Okay, for rhythm (which is mispelled in the first stanza). I kind of wished while reading that you had kept the same syllabic count throughout. It breaks at "I dance to fly," and rapidly degrades from there.

Otherwise, I liked it. Dancing is sort of a rare topic when not used metaphorically. The simplicity of the language worked well here.
8.9/10

Posted 14 Years Ago


Good description for dancing. That is hard to do for this subject. I don't even know how to dance. Anyways, good write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I love the imagery in that one, you did a great job with the details :D

Posted 14 Years Ago


This poem gives alot of discribsion on what a dancer does when they dance they dont think they just dance to fly

Posted 14 Years Ago


Great write, rhythm is spelled wrong in the third line, other then that I thought It was pretty awesome. It gave a sense of freedom when I read it, rhythm and rhyme were on point. Keep writing.

Posted 14 Years Ago


the last stanza is my favorite.. the flow is amazing.. the third stanza really sets up for teh fourth... its amazing another masterpiece

Posted 14 Years Ago


This is nice. It remind me of my wife. She dances and for the same reason. Good work.

Posted 14 Years Ago



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7 Reviews
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Added on April 5, 2010
Last Updated on April 5, 2010

Author

Elaine
Elaine

Twin Falls, ID



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