The Stress of Both Worlds

As the poem continues, the child gets older and expresses how they handle the divorce still. Inspired by the song Two Houses by Matthew West *Meant for spoken word poetry

Two people
Two words.
"I do."
But for how long before it breaks?..

For as long as I can remember, it's always been two of everything.
Two Christmases equals twice the gifts..
and being handed off twice as much.
And whoever says two is better than one clearly doesn't have a split family.
Why didn't you get me this week, were you too busy for me?
Both houses feel so cold without both of you here to come home to.
Take a step back and look..

Mommy, I don't understand why Daddy wasn't enough for you. This new guy doesn't love me like Daddy does. Does he even love you?
And Daddy, I don't understand why you're never here when I wake up. You stay gone so much.
I don't understand why you're screaming at each other and Sissy is always crying.
Why is everyone so upset? 
Why are you fighting over us? Did I do something to make you stop loving each other?
I don't want to remember the hurt in your eyes when I said I wanted to spend time with the other parent.
I still hold Mommy's hand..
Why don't you?

Is the lonely feeling supposed to go away over time?..
Because I can't seem to keep anyone around long enough to fill the void.
I guess you taught me well.
My sister is my closest friend because she's the only thing that's ever been constant.
Mom, can't you please just stay in one place for more than a year.
These houses feel colder than your heart.
I wish you would understand why I don't want to unpack my things anymore.
I just don't see a purpose.
Why can't you see I'm so tired?
And Dad, I'm so sorry I left. I just can't stand the way your wife loves Sis, but has never loved me.

And, "How was school?" Sounds so much better with four ears to hear the answer.

Having twice the stuff is never worth the heartbreak to your excited parent that the other already got it for you.
And for the record, Mom, thanks for dropping my hand to take husband the third's.
Does being in a different state let you escape the sounds of me crying that I miss you?
They make phones for that.
But you wouldn't know if I didn't call. 
You may be hours away, but you carry my heart in the palm of your hand.

 

I don't see how everyone is moving on and I'm still here.
It's been so long and I wish I remembered better days.
All I really want is to say that I was really a kid once, that I didn't grow up too fast.
But I was taught not to lie..
And that trust runs short and nothing lasts forever, especially not love.
He loves me, but why can't I seem to stay without being scared?
I can't help the anger that rises and boils underneath when people talk about their perfect families.
Other kids wonder what's for dinner, when all I can wonder is when I'm going to see my sister next.
Mother, I love you, but you've taught me what I never want to be.
And Dad, you've always been my light through the dark tunnel of my life. I'm sorry it took so long to let you know me.

I never stopped loving you both, I just wish it had been that easy for you..
"I do."
..So why couldn't you?

Author's Note

I know this isn't my usual style, but I wanted to write this differently. I'm open for reviews :)

Reviews

[Chris Yip]

Wow, heart wrenching stuff! Frustration and pain boils through between the lines and words express the girl's longing for her parents to be together again. Feelings of being less loved and understood echo throughout the poem. Well presented Fonts and line arrangements. Well thought out. thanks for such an emotional write and ride from a young daughter's point of view.

[Apebble]

Congratulations on winning! After reading the poem, you truly do deserve it. While I generally dislike poetry without rhyme, your poem is one of the few I enjoy. The content kept me interested and had a sad yet beautiful message.

Keep writing please!

[Alana McGuire]

Thank you so much! I really appreciate you taking the time to read and review. I tend to enjoy the poem that really hits home to the writer. :)

[Skylar]

I love this poem it is very heart wrenching to me since I can relate to having divorced parents :( and I love these words "For as long as I can remember, it's always been two of everything.
Two Christmases equals twice the gifts..
and being handed off twice as much.
And whoever says two is better than one clearly doesn't have a split family.
Why didn't you get me this week, were you too busy for me?
Both houses feel so cold without both of you here to come home to."
Cause its the exact truth.

[Alana McGuire]

Thank you so much for the read and review! I'm sorry that you can relate to it, it's not an easy lifestyle.

[nigrum homonculus]

this was painful. especially. "You may be hours away, but you carry my heart in the palm of your hand." naaa thats not life. a very good write though well done

[R J Askew]

I've read a lot of starry eyes love poems, mostly not that hot. And I've read a lot about the pain of being dumped or betrayed. And I've read two or three like this one. Poems like this one are the hardest to read because they show how the pain of the split hurts the lives of the innocent. My view is that parents has absolutely no right to put their personal hopes and happiness above the hopes and happiness of children they have brought into the world. Divorce when there are children involved is an absolute wrong to my mind. Parental duties outweigh an individual's selfish rights to personal happiness. If this involves them sacrificing their happiness so be it. They have no right to argue in front of their children. Any adult who allows a family to break up and leaves their children in a state of confusion is a contemptible failure. We have to die for our children and if we have to die everyday of our lives for them, so be it. Any parent who walks away from their duties deserves to be stuck in a public pillory and pelted with insults and rotten vegetables. We are all damaged when a family is destroyed by civil war within it. But selfishness is the order of the day for many now. So your poem gets to me.

[Reaper]

amazing. utterly amazing poem. The colors add a lot to the poem. overall just well done.

[Alex Vidmar]

Wow. this was beautiful. absolutely beautiful. Added to my library. Loved it. Keep it up!

~Alex

[tanaya]

Wow... I can really relate to this as you could see with my poem... Amazing!! Great work I could really feel the emotion in it!

[Chrissy]

Excellent.

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

This is a different way of style for you but you pulled it off, a touchy subject yet nicely touched with the emotions wrapped in your words through out from beginning to end. Very nicely done, couldn't help but get a reader/me wrapped in the emotion. A heart tugging write with emotions. Nice, very nice.
Love this part, so sad and touching:
"I still hold Mommy's hand..
Why don't you?"
Also love how you brought the ending and beginning together with the "I do".

[DESTROYA]

This is my favorite poem I've read of yours so far. It seems to precisely speak the thoughts of someone in this situation. The emotions are very specifically explained and mapped out so that anyone can relate to it. It seemed very honest. I really like the style you chose for this one. It was easy to follow and matched the content.