Portraits

Nothing hurts more than a painted rose.

Delicately painted roses wither

In the hands of a wretch;

Serving only as a mockery

With every line that’s been sketched.

 

She shaded endless skies

Consisting of every puddle I wept;

And embellished scarlet petals;

With every crimson tear I shed.

 

Then she rose with her canvas,

Walked off to paint another;

Left with an incomplete portrait,

I lifted high the razor.

 

Gashes in my skin,

I confronted my beautifully maligned;

Burgundy flowing out my veins,

As I begged her to complete mine.

Author's Note

I know, I kind of lost the vibe near the end. No need to tell me; I am quite aware of it.

Reviews

[Baby Ricochet]

The first two stanzas are classic Tai.

[Forever Hidden]

This is really amazing. I like the first paragraph. I don't know why, but it is a great way to start a poem!

[eeoopig]

I love dark poetry and I love this. Good job :)

[demureminds]

The vibe near the end was amazing, I actually liked it a lot. Again, wonderful flow and the imagery is remarkable. The metaphors also contributed to the greatness in this piece.

[ewest1220]

Love the imagery of the painting. Very very dark but hey you've read my work I'm not exactly all about sunshine and rainbows lol overall I really liked this piece and you gotta stop bashing yourself my friend. I love reading your work!

[kayla]

Wow...This is really dark, but no worries, I've been there.
Overall, this is a great poem. I like the rhymne scheme and the stanzas.
Keep it up(:

[Extant]

Hmm, an unfinished portrait. I guess the human portrait is unfinished until we die . . . That's sounds much more depressing than I thought it would.
"She shaded endless skies
consisting of every puddle I wept,"
I'm trying to think of what to say about this line, but it is so brilliant and speaks perfectly for itself. The reason for all your tears is her.

[Rhea752]

wow Ryan. you actually painted the picture with your words. beautifully done!!! :)