BLACK AND DARK

 Sleep does not come to her so she writes and wishes for better days...
Were there better days? She can not remember them at this moment.
She sees the black, the dark. She sees all the pain and it is all wrapped up in one sharp homemade shaft of a knife.
This has become her heart.
The pain she feels is boundless, endless and deep. There is no rest or comfort for her.
She is alone in this and the hole that once was her heart grows deeper, wider, colder, bigger. What is left to feel when all you felt is gone.
She has picked herself up again and again but now she has exhausted herself, she has no more strength to lift herself, breathing is even hard.
The sadness, it is eternal, it is so much of who she is now she forgets who she was and wonders if it will ever end.
Earth is her pergatory, she can not rest, she crys silently in the night and the tears do not fall, there are none left to give.
So many times and so much, she has fought for so long, but her strength has escaped her, she runs on fumes alone.
Do not ask her to smile, to laugh, to cry, she may be able to give a long anguished scream which she feels deep within herself.
She never knew how far and deep in the dark the pain could take her. It is a never ending ocean where she swims alone.
She is scared, she feels no hope, that went along time ago with smiles and laughter and the genuine feelings of love.
Now she is a fragile shell with many cracks. At any moment you may see her break into
 a countless amount of pieces that can not be repaired. That can not be fixed by anything.
All she hoped for has been lost, she is alone, in the black..in the dark.