In My Pocket

This poem is based on a note I have carried with me since June 17, 1997. It is the last note my boyfriend sent before he killed himself. I have always wondered what I could have done to save him.

In my pocket I hold a memory.

I was once a child wild and free.

I had hopes and dreams long forgotten now

That I’m the woman I was meant to be.

 

In my pocket is a letter written in shame.

A boy half man, half child wrote it to me.

Tears and age have made it weak,

And the words too faded almost to see.

 

Into my pocket I must reach

To pull out this treasure so full of pain.

Written on the night my life changed forever.

Will I ever be free again?

 

In my pocket I think to find hope

But there is nothing inside but fear.

I want to pull it out and throw it away,

As I’ve longed to do for so many years.

 

In my pocket…

 

Victoria Spencer-Keene

5-1-07

Author's Note

This poem is incredibly personal to me, and I hope that you keep that in mind when reviewing. That said, I would like to publish this poem and therefore I am asking that you also be honest.