Chapter 1

It begins

Moving my body to beat of the music was all I knew at that moment , nothing else mattered. It was just me and the music. It was my escape, my favorite reality ,my own little world. I never wanted to leave this reality because the one waiting for me was nothing but a set of broken nothingness. Too bad that was about as possible as me visiting the North POLE this Christmas. Santa would never invite me.

The dance studio was empty of anyone but me. I guess it was to be expected , considering the time. 2 am is hardly the time to be at a dance studio dancing. Oh well , except for me anyway. Insomnia gives us the strangest of ideas. I think, the mind tries to be creative with nothing else to do.

****

As the time turned to 5 o'clock in the morning I was getting out of my car , making my way into the house. On the way up to my room I saw a man eating pizza in the kitchen so naturally, I stopped and stared until he raised his head to look my face.

"Can I help you , hon???

"I don't know. Can you?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

He just smiled and shook his head ,"What's up, Chels?"

"Nothing dad, just glad to see you. is mom back too?"

"Yes baby, she's just at the office at the moment but she should be back soon enough."

"Okay, estaré en mi habitación ." I kissed his cheek and left for my room. (I'll be in my room )

Just as I was about to close the door to my room I heard him yell, "Te amo cariño!" (I love you, baby)

I smiled at that. My dad's Russian but since my mom's Spanish he makes sure to speak Spanish a lot at home. Since they travel a lot because of their jobs they know many different languages, so it's not much of a problem , with no other choice I had to learn the different languages also. The two of them might not be home often but I know they love me sky size and I love them just as much and we are as close as we can be despite the distance that often separates us.

As tired as I am I don't fall asleep so I decide to take a shower hoping it will help, it doesn't. I end up resorting to pills, I hate them with a burning passion but I need them when things are this bad. I fall into a dreamless sleep , not unusual for me especially with the pills in my system.

I wake up when I hear my mom slip inside my room, I don't make it known that I'm awake . I hear her move around my room , taking note of the pictures on the wall. I know if I looked at her now I'd see pure undiluted pain on her face but no tears , never tears. She sits on my bed and I feel her gaze on my face and I keep up the façade of a peaceful sleep, something I mastered the hard way. A story to never be told again.

" oh yo te fallé, cariño. Incluso ahora, no parece suficiente. " I hear her whisper as her hand moves on my cheek. I open my eyes now, knowing she'd never believe that I'd sleep through that. ( oh I failed you, sweetheart. Even now ,it doesn't seem nearly enough.)

"Mama, welcome back home." I say the same words I've been saying to her ever since I was ten.

She smiles and kisses my forehead, " I'm glad I'm home , honey."

After we had our own mini reunion ,mom and I went downstairs to dad, mom had said they had something to talk to me about.

********

"Honey, we have another assignment." my dad stated as my mom and I set down. I looked at him quizzically. " I'm assuming there's something different about this assignment , seeing as you don't usually tell me."

" Yes ,it's different . It's a year long ,if not more , assignment. " my mother was the one to answer me this time.

"Oh, okay. so what's the problem? I know they aren't normally that long but I'd think it changes nothing."

"It does , we don't want you to be alone for that long, so we thought it would be best if you went to New York to live with your aunt and her husband and son." My dad replied.

As much as it wasn't a question , my opinion was required , they cared about what I wanted. Since I had no friends or anything tying me to London what so ever , I didn't mind moving and I knew they would be more at ease knowing I wasn't alone. I smiled at the most important people in my life.

" Okay, when do I move to NYC? "

My mom chuckled , " As early as next week. we want you to start school at the same time as everyone else."

Time flew by with nothing significant happening and soon enough I'd moved to New York City and my parents were who knows where doing whatever it is that they do. I never asked.

The important part is about to follow anyway.

Author's Note

this chapter is in the present tense but the other will be in the past. I think. don't forget to tell me what you think. thanks for reading.