In God's Time

A Story by kurohana

A short love story.

In God’s Time

Life is nothing expected, it doesn’t give a direct and clear answer. It makes you walk casually, sometimes making you run for your life, and then suddenly making you stop giving a fork road where you’re left rooted on the ground for so long or worse making you face a wall that doesn’t have a door to walk through.

See what I mean? Life is a roller coaster ride, giving you a twist, a huge loop, and up and down experience. But in the end it is all up to you how you ride life and use it to mold yourself into something you could be proud of.

“Earth to Rain, helloooo!!” Alma said then waving her hands in front of me gaining back my attention.

“Hey there Alma, I’m sorry what are you saying again?” I answered sheepishly.

“You’re day dreaming again, or are you thinking of that b*****d again, hmm?” she asked looking angry and concern at the same time. Just so you know, I just broke up with my long term boyfriend a week ago so right now, my mind is always floating around when my friends drag me out of my room or just plainly laying in my bed bawling my eyes out. In short, I’m depressed.

“Are we done here? Can we please go home?” I asked her changing the topic coz I know if I answer her our conversation will just go on forever.

“No, we are not yet done. I won’t just leave you back to your depressed state when you’re in your room again.”

Alma said looking sad.

I sighed. “Alright, so where do you want to go after this?” Seeing her sad face transforms into a happy one makes me smile a little.

I got home almost midnight already, I don’t want to admit it but I had fun tonight and the entire time I didn’t think of him. After taking a shower and brush my teeth, I went straight to my bed ready to succumb in sleep but after I close my eyes my phone rings. I ignored the rings and tried to sleep but the phone is taking forever to stop!

“Who the f**k is calling at this time?!” Irritated, I snatch the phone at my side table and look who’s the persistent caller but it’s just a number.

Staring at the phone in hand, still thinking who might the caller be but can’t think who. Then it stopped ringing, maybe the caller gave up, not a minute passed by its ringing again. My curiosity spikes up so I answered the call.

“Hello?”

“Hi, did I wake you up?” a low, manly voice answered, it stands out even though the background is full of other voices. I don’t know who the owner of the voice is and I don’t recognize it either but hearing it soothes me.

“No, you didn’t but who is this? Do you even know who I am and what time it is?” I asked.

I heard several male voices laughing from the background.

“Whooaaa, she answered dude!”

“Hey bro, who is she anyway?” They sounded drunk, maybe it’s just a random prank calls?

“Hi, I apologize for that. My friends are really noisy. This is Rain right?” That voice again, maybe he transfers to a different spot since the background is quiet. Wait, he knows my name so this is not a random call.

“Before I answer your question, who is this and where did you get my number?” I retorted.

He chuckled and it sounds pleasant, “Ah sorry about that, I don’t know if you still remember me. I’m Carter from high school, rings a bell?”

Carter… The guy who used to like me back in high school but didn’t give him a chance since I already liked someone.

“Yes, I remember who you are. I didn’t expect you still remember me. Where did you get my number?” I asked him again while I lay back to my bed making myself comfortable.

“I asked Alma about your number. She gave it to me and I tried calling you to see if you’ll answer and I’m glad you did.” He said surprising me a little with his words.

“I see, so you don’t expect me answering your call then maybe because you’re calling when people are about to sleep.” I said jokingly and a small laugh escaped my lips.

I heard him laugh, making me smile in return. “You see, I got your number not long ago from Alma but I don’t have the guts to call you and my friends know it, so tonight while we’re drinking they dare me to call you to see if you’re going to answer. I had a few drinks already so why not and here I am, talking to the girl who long ago dumped me.”

Surprised, I fell silent for a moment and then he breaks it by saying, “Hey it’s no biggy, besides I’m an a*****e back then, but hey I’m not playing with you back then when I said I liked you.”

I chuckled, coz the main reason why I didn’t entertain him before is because I was convinced that he and his friend were just playing with me.

“Really? I thought you and Vince were just placing bets on who score on me.” I retorted back and chuckled.

Our conversation lasted quite a while which is unexpected, I really haven’t talked to Carter like this before, I mean I think I never really had any decent conversation with him. Unexpectedly, I enjoyed our late night chat. I also slept without crying myself to sleep.

Days, weeks, and months passed and I can feel myself slowly moving on, burying whatever events that connects my ex and I. My best friend, Alma helped a lot in the process. Never leaving my side and always cheering me up, bringing me to different places where we would just enjoy and pamper ourselves. And Carter, the least expected person that would likely push me forward, after our conversation that night, he continued to text and calls me sometimes. We just talked about random things, laughed stupidly at his jokes and so on.

“Do you have a date today?” Emma suddenly asked. Emma is my officemate, blonde, beautiful and a body to die for kind of woman. Even though she look snobbish, she is kind and we do get along pretty well.

“Why do you asked?” I replied.

“Girl! Today is Valentine’s day! Go find yourself a date.” Emma tapped my shoulders, encouraging me while wiggling her eyebrows. Surprised at what she said, I looked at my desk calendar and yeah, it is February 14.

“I’m fine Emma, just enjoy your date tonight.” I said smiling.

“ Alright then, see you tomorrow girl but seriously go find yourself a date and forget about that scumbag.” Emma said cursing while referring to my ex while she bid her goodbye. As she walks away I smile at her words, even though she doesn’t show it much I can feel that she is concern and I deeply appreciate it.

While I’m arranging my things, I saw my phone. Just staring at it, debating if I’m going to greet him, oh well it’s not like its bad to greet someone on Valentine ’s Day.

I texted Carter, “happy valentine’s day!”

When I’m about to leave, my phone rings and its Carter calling, I answered the call but instead of a male’s voice, a woman’s voice replied.

“This is Carter’s girlfriend, who is this and why are you texting my boyfriend?” She asked in a snappy voice.

A little bit taken aback and answered defensively, “I’m a friend and the text was a group message.” I said even though it wasn’t. If I remember correctly Carter told me they broke up already, maybe they got back without him informing me.

“Don’t text my boyfriend again.” She said and hanged up the phone.

Shocked and speechless, I went straight home still thinking of the call. Starting that day he never texted or called me again, and I never did initiate a move to contact him either.

Months passed and no word from him. My life continues like nothing happens and I pushed the incident at the back of my mind. I was sad that our starting friendship just ended like that without a word of warning but as they say its life, unexpected things happens all the time.

“Are you coming with us to dinner?” Emma asked as she finished fixing her things and ready to leave.

“Yeah I will, but for a while I’ll just finished filing this documents and I’m ready to go. Where are we eating anyway?” I asked her as I continue to work on my papers.

“Hmmm.. I want Italian foods but.. Hey guys what do you want to eat? I want Italian.” Emma shouted to Nicole and Elsa who are seating on the couch. They talked for a while before answering.

“We’re okay with Italian. So you can choose what resto we’re going to eat Emma.” Nicole said, a beautiful, tall blonde woman. She is also kind, gullible and very accommodating to everyone in the office so she gets along with all the people without problem.

Opposite of her is Elsa, she is very quiet and shy. But when you get to know her, she is very talkative and fun to be with. Elsa and I have more in common than Emma coz Emma is the outgoing type of person and very adventurous. She wanted to go to different places which she drags me most of the time. But don’t get me wrong, I love going out with her, it’s like I’m discovering myself and learning that I can do stuff if only I pushed myself a little.

After I finished filing my stuffs, we went to Emma’s favorite Italian restaurant. The place is quite full so we waited for about 15 minutes before they gave us a table. When our orders arrived we immediately dig in coz we’re really hungry. For some time we’re just concentrating on eating our foods until Nicole broke the silence.

“Are we here on a prayer meeting or to enjoy our food and each other’s company, huh?”

We all looked at her serious face and look at each other then laughed out loud which caught the attention of the people around us.

“Oh come on girl, we’re hungry so let it slide.” Emma said laughing.

“Yeah and now that food already entered our system, we can start our chit chat.” I said.

The night was spent full of laughter and eating. After we are done in the restaurant, we went to a bar nearby.

Since today is a Friday, they all want to relieve some stress by going all out and have fun. We drink, dance and chat. A lot of guys approached our tables but we all shoo them away coz tonight is girls night.

Around 3am we all decided to call it a night. By that time tiredness started to kick in so we all bid our goodbyes and ride a cab home. We drink but we’re not drunk to the point we can no longer took care of ourselves. When I arrived at my apartment, I took off my shoes and went straight to bed, just staring at the ceiling as my eyes starting to close and then my phone rings.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot I should text them that I got home safely. But when I looked at my phone, instead of a text message it’s a message from Facebook. The one that surprised me is the person who sent the message, Carter.

Message conversation:

Carter: Hi, can I get your number?

Me: Sure, so what’s up? You suddenly disappear after your girlfriend called me.

Carter: I’m sorry about that, by the way she already isn’t my girlfriend that time. I was sleeping and our housekeeper just let her in since she knows her and went to my room then looked at my phone.

Hmm.. So she can come and go in there house?

Me: So you guys are back together right now? Coz I don’t want her to think that I am stealing her guy.

Carter: No. We broke up a long time ago and there’s no chance for us to get back together. I didn’t contact you after that incident because I am worried that you are mad for what she did.

Me: I am not mad, I’m just surprised. That is the first time some girl was thinking I am after her man. Well past is past, we can no longer change what happen.

At this moment my eyes are already closing and I can no longer command it to open so I surrender myself to sleep.

The next day I woke up around 10 in the morning and still feeling a little sleepy. So I just stay in bed and close my eyes again.

Ring!! Ring! Ring!! Waking up again due to the sound of my phone, I slowly roll on my bed in the direction of my side table where the ringing is coming from. Grabbing my phone and looking at it. Someone is calling but it wasn’t registered so only a number is showing. I sleepily answer the call.

“Hello?” My voice is still hoarse from just waking up.

“Hi, looks like I woke you up this time.” Carter said sounding sheepish and suddenly all the sleepiness just vanish and I’m totally awake.

“Carter? Hey, I don’t remember giving you my number last night.” Hearing his voice makes me feel happy.

“Yes you did, check your last message last night.” He said laughing a little.

“Well, never mind you already got it anyway. So…. What’s up?” It’s been a while since we last talk, I don’t know what I’m going to say and additional to that I just woke up and my brain isn’t functioning properly yet.

“Are you reading manga?” he said interrupting the flow of my thoughts. I pause and slowly processing what he just said. When it hits me, my mind is flowing with so much thought.

“Yes, I love reading manga! And you?” I said with excitement. I have a potential someone who I can talk anime or manga with. Then a loud laugh is coming from the other side of the line. Is he laughing at me? What the hell?!

“Why the hell are you laughing at me?” I said a little bit offended.

“Hey hey, don’t get mad. You just took me by surprise back there. You proudly and excitedly said that you love reading manga. So what can you recommend?” He said and after that everything just passed so quickly, we chat none stop almost the whole day like he didn’t disappear for months.

Just like that I let him enter my life again.

We spend so much time texting and talking on phone coz he live in a different state than I am. Along those times we learn to slowly like each other more than friends. I started to fall for him, getting attached even though we still don’t know where our relationship will take us.

Two months after he asked me to be his girlfriend before he’ll go to Canada for work, but I didn’t give him a clear answer because being in a long distant relationship is not easy. We both end up deciding that it is better to just go with the flow and see what will happen. Soon after he left, we still have contact with each other thru Skype, but unlike before we can only talk for a short time since he is busy with work all the time and always tired after. I understand what our situation right now, I don’t want to hold him back to his career because I want more time with him. Months passed and our contact slowly decreases due to work and I feel hurt and discarded but I still choose to understand him.

One night when I was about to sleep I got a call from him, I was happy and excited at the same time not knowing that what he is about to tell me will finally break me.

“Hi babe.” I answered.

“Hello, listen Rain, I want this to stop. I no longer have time for you and right now I have a lot of problems piling up one after the other especially here in my work and I don’t want you to get involved in any of this. Let just stop.” He said. It took me several minutes to process everything that he said. Why? Despite everything I’ve done for him, understanding him and being patience with him all the time he still want to end this?! Maybe he found another girl he likes that’s why he wanted to end what we have.

“Do you have someone else? Is that the real reason for this? You don’t have to lie to me and use your work as an excuse. Please tell me the truth, coz I love you so much, I don’t want this to end.” I cried and beg him to stay. But my plea went to deaf ears and he stick to his decision.

“I’m sorry but this is for your own good. I don’t know when I’ll be able to finally fix myself, right now my life is a mess and just like what I said I don’t want you to get you involved. Your life will just get messy if you stay with me. You deserve someone better.” I feel myself breaking with his every word, the weight in my heart is so heavy that I can keep this up so I give way to what he want.

“I feel like you won’t change your mind with this, so I’ll let you go your way if you insist on this. It deeply hurts me but I can’t do anything about it.” It hurts inside but I should be able to hang on.

“If you need anything from me you can just text or call me. Goodbye.”

“I’ll be here if ever you need me. I love you and goodbye Carter.” As I hang up the phone, I just lay in my bed and cried, letting it all go as I fall to sleep. Again I am back to where I started, alone and broken.

A few days after that call I still message him but most of the time he isn’t replaying. Still hoping he’ll change his mind coz I felt he love me but I guess love is not enough.

I don’t regret ever accepting him in my life, letting him stay and loving him. He taught me so much and makes me feel happy and this feeling is something different than what I felt before. I gave him all of me, I love him too much and leave little for myself.

In this dark chapter of my life, Alma, my best friend once again stood by my side. She helped me recover and pick up every pieces of me. She never brought up the incident again instead she dedicated herself to cheer me up every time and I am very thankful of her efforts. I am blessed to have given her to me by God. Because of her relentless efforts to bring me back together, I slowly make a step forward and started to laugh once again. Taking one step at a time in recovering what was left of me.

Months later

“Rain, hurry up! We’re already hungry.” Emma shouted at the lobby of our office while I’m hurrying to finish all the papers that my boss just given me earlier today.

“Yes yes, just a minute I’m almost done geez.” I said rolling my eyes at her.

“Hey lady, I saw that! You don’t roll your eyes on me.” She said walking towards me with her hands on her waist looking serious imitating our boss but can’t hold it since it is obvious that she is about to laugh at her actions.

I looked at her at the top of my glasses and said, “You so don’t act like her so stop it. It looks funny as hell.” I laughed as she shrugged her shoulders and smiled sheepishly.

“I miss hearing you laugh like that Rain. You should laugh more.” She said looking concern and happy at the same time that she made me laugh.

A few months had passed and I can say I’m recovering very well. My life went back normally, going to work every day but the pain is still there. They said time will heal all wounds, so I’ll wait till all of mine will completely heal leaving a scar to remember, trusting God for my future.

As we are about to leave to have our usual Friday night out, my phone rings so I stop to see who it is and was stop dead when I saw the name. I thought this person wouldn’t affect me this much but I was wrong, the fact remains that I still love him.

Carter calling…..

The End