Expelled

new to new friends, old to old.

 

Expelled

 

Words as sharp as a double-edged saber,

cutting into my fleshy heart.

My head is spinning

and my shredded heart

is spreading an icy glaze

over it's pulsating warmth;

cauterizing the crimson course.

I am frozen solid.

I'm drowning under frigid waters.

I see your stern face floating,

as though it is disembodied.

I am too cold to protest. Too cold to feel.

Defaming words detach themselves from me,

circle around my head, and drift away in the current.

I wonder how I ever loved you, for I do not know you now.

　

You are done with me. I am expelled from the garden.

An angel guards our fruit-laden tree with his flaming sword,

Forcing me to leave out of hunger and humiliation.

Blinded by tears, I wander to unknown lands

that do not open their arms to welcome me.

I hate you with a ferocity I've never known before.

You have discarded my love like a worn-out blanket,

it pains me to know a new comforter covers you in the night.

I wonder how I ever loved you, for I do not know you now.

 

Reviews

[manish]

class apart from many i have read...take a bow...

[Nautili]

Thank you so much....I appreciate your kind words.

[Dream Weaver]

Beautifully scripted as a love/hate collision
that was once an adoring fit gone awry.
I see deeper innuendo's masking the true
heart-break and the damage done.
Wonderful writing here!

You will find the perfect outline, between two contrasts, red as the warmth and love, and blue, as chill, rigide or, even death, by flowing crimson, like words dancing in the lost time, and froze like true friends are able to. beautiful dear, a wise metaphor, and aspect. I saw the painting in purple, as your heart is xo

E.L.

[Eagle Cruagh]

I lovethis line, I have felt it more
than once.
"You have discarded my love like a worn-out blanket"
Wanton love squandered on the unfeeling, unknowing.
'A ferocious lady aroused by a mindless , unfeeling
male.
discarded.

Try a man this time.
-----John

[Lawrence Parlier]

Another great work. You do a wonderful job of portraying all of the chaotic emotions involved.

[Monica]

Very powerful! Expelled is a well written poem. There are so many lines that captured me...you are talented!

[Damien]

Wonderful writing, I love the way you grip us and still paint us a picture of it and the last sentence is just superb.
Keep on writing because you´re doing a great job!

[Robbie~xoxo~]

This is Magnificently written... Your words sear into the heart!.. The ferocity is fiercely lit, igniting the hatred!
Wow! You are on fire with this write... I am amazed!

"I hate you with a ferocity I've never known before.
You have discarded my love like a worn-out blanket,
it pains me to know a new comforter covers you in the night.
I wonder how I ever loved you, for I do not know you now."~ Such Pain within the hatred, touches the core!

"You are done with me. I am expelled from the garden.
An angel guards our fruit-laden tree with his flaming sword,
Forcing me to leave out of hunger and humiliation.
Blinded by tears, I wander to unknown lands"~ Superb depiction within this..Bravo!

[rivers]

The quality of this piece is remarkable. The imagery paints a dark but passionate emotional picture of how things go wrong leaving us loathing the very fruit that energizes the soul. Quote:

"You are done with me. I am expelled from the garden.
An angel guards our fruit-laden tree with his flaming sword,
Forcing me to leave out of hunger and humiliation."

My feeling is abandonment, and exile and banishment into isolation realizing it's over...quote:
"You have discarded my love like a worn-out blanket,
it pains me to know a new comforter covers you in the night."

Déjà vu...
u