Lovesick

Read it just for fun

 When i was 18 year old boy

When i saw her first time i was in full joy

I wanted to be her the only guy

I always saw standing far from her

One day i went near

 to propose her

But what i saw was

 she was much taller

i gave rose,everyone laughed at me

 like i was a joker

I felt like to hang myself to ceiling fan

But hey girl you please tell me

why did you drink COMPLAN....

When i was 23 year old boy

I met another girl and i was in full joy

This time i went near to her and made my friend

We chatted day and night like there is no end

I gave gifts to her she said'You are my best friend'

With full courage one day 

i went to propose her

But she rejected me saying 

you are like my brother

She married another guy 

with full cheer

I was in the bar 

drinking a case of beer

Now i am 28 year old boy

If i see girls i say tata byebye

This is the sad story of mine

Hey god please tell me

How to put a Girl in line...

 

Reviews

[Anindita Janhabee]

hahahaha. ..... ...
first do tell me is it true or a fiction ???
tremendous man!!!!!!
wow..like..... (smiles )
you'll get what u deserve and what's in your destiny...........
you don't need to put anyone in line.....

[Kuldeep desai]

that was some bullshit i wrote when i was in 12th std......it doesn't imply to me........its nonsense

[Anindita Janhabee]

hey... that's fine... that was good too

[Coyote Poetry]

Old man wisdom. Woman cannot be controlled. Must make the woman feel safe and like where she is. Woman control the world. Men think they do. I enjoyed your thoughts and struggle. I had a few myself. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[ayejodie]

I enjoyed this poem! It was humorous and I sensed the humility of the character. Such a familiar story that a lot of people experience, giving up on love but you right it in such an amusing and readable way 😊

[ayejodie]

Write* sorry

[Kuldeep desai]

thank you for the review........ I am glad you have liked it...... if you have enjoyed that's enough for me......

[Confuser]

I loved the story, in the beginning got a big laugh with the ceiling fan, thank you. Keep it up. Very good prose. I enjoyed it very much.

[Kuldeep desai]

Thank you......

[Confuser]

You are welcome.

[Emily]

I love how you started it!
Keep it up!

[Kuldeep desai]

thank you for the review..........

[SonOfaSailor]

This was so sad when I was under the impression that it was you. Lots of grammar errors so give it a reread once or twice if you want to refine it. It tells the story well.

[Kuldeep desai]

Bro......read it once again I have done mistakes purposely...

[SonOfaSailor]

Now that I read it again I imagine it in Borat's voice haha

[Kuldeep desai]

Hahahaha........

[Tasfia Islam]

Ha ha ....this is so damn funny... really good... :) But one thing I wanted to say is, the title doesn't suit the poem i guess..... Cuz its not really a lovestory...... Right??

[Kuldeep desai]

yeah i wrote it for fun sake............ i too feel that title doesn't suit can you suggest some god one if you don't mind.......

[Tasfia Islam]

Maybe..... "Lovesick" or "Why not me?"

[Kuldeep desai]

"Why not me?"...... Is good....

[Tasfia Islam]

Hmmm maybe,,,, but in my point of view, lovesick is better. Suits perfectly with ur poem. Take a look on the definition of lovesick. You will get to know... Anyways, I'm just saying....

[Kuldeep desai]

OK..........

[hardeep sabharwal]

No matter it is funny or sad, heart break are heartbreak,, though it is written in a simple way, it was a nice read,, thankyou for sharing :)

[Kuldeep desai]

Actually i wanted You all to read this poem......... Thank you for your review..........

[Prabha Salimath]

Kuldeep a very emotional with funny comments I liked it indeed, your first stanza, I had experienced when I was at my teen, I dint laugh but its so pathetic.
In a way or two you lost hope in girls, I don't think so you should do this to yourself, be patient you'll get a girl as predestined just read my poem " Fate - a book " you'll get a little idea and you don't need to put her in line. I feel couple should be balanced for a happy life. I pray to God to give you a girl ASAP.

[Kuldeep desai]

lol.......no this poem is not about me and i have written it like for funny sake no need to take it seriously........ofcourse i agree with you couple should be balanced......and thanks for wishing good for me i hope that i wont be drinking beer at bar...........

[Prabha Salimath]

Lol..... I wish you not that disaster....