Some apologies fall onto the faces of a teetering complexion in the way a rock concert crowd settles into its inevitable wow-and-flutter beat too late to identify with the song it was intended for and so participates onward to settle on a synergistic compromise sorely in a stubborn foray into a band's elliptic segue of tempos tampered with by clapping clashes of contrition and epinephrine Cue the holding in of urgency in vows of distance in impressions of apologies insisting innocence incognito Sorrow has an evil twin The name is fear It would be wise to not apologize until one is aware of the exact emotion being groomed for acceptance
Sure, blame the evil twin, works for me. A brilliant analogy, but you knew that already, the dance is always a good metaphor no matter what the sticky situation, 'contrition and epinephrine'...priceless!... you know Epinephrine is a 'hormone' that is chemically identical to the adrenaline produced by the body, just saying... It's not over 'til the fat lady hums a few bars... ;) xo
Ha, I wasn't blaming him, just acknowledging his presence...I actually had 'adrenaline' in there fir.. read moreHa, I wasn't blaming him, just acknowledging his presence...I actually had 'adrenaline' in there first but I ultimately elected to go with the hormone for a number of reasons...you know I always do my homework Mrs.R ;)
What's that quote by Neiztche? Those who were dancing were thought to be insane by those who weren't, or something like that...not that it means we aren't insane mind you haha So glad you enjoyed this one love...xo
The message in this one was great! I know a lot of people who are constantly apologizing for seemingly nothing, but now that I think about it, perhaps it is for some kind of emotion they are feeling that they are ashamed of. I may need to pay more attention to see what they are really trying to say. I thought the flow in this one was really natural, and the scattered alliterations and incidental rhyming was a pleasure to come across as well.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I am one of those people...I have people telling me constantly that I apologize for too much haha I .. read moreI am one of those people...I have people telling me constantly that I apologize for too much haha I think I know why, but it's a long story...this one required quite a bit of tinkering and probably took me two or three days to finish...so glad you enjoyed it my friend, and thanks so much for the time you've devoted to reading and reviewing me, it means the world :)
10 Years Ago
My best friend is like that. And when I tell her she has nothing to be sorry about she apologizes fo.. read moreMy best friend is like that. And when I tell her she has nothing to be sorry about she apologizes for saying sorry. Haha! Got to love her though! It is always a treat to read your work my friend!
Not much to say to this one Steve as it has already been said and I second what everyone has said here. I do love the analogy you have written and the wording makes it powerful, very good, vivid poem dude.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thanks so much Noodlebop, you know your support means the world...I'm glad you enjoyed it, I spent q.. read moreThanks so much Noodlebop, you know your support means the world...I'm glad you enjoyed it, I spent quite a bit of time on this one.
Sure, blame the evil twin, works for me. A brilliant analogy, but you knew that already, the dance is always a good metaphor no matter what the sticky situation, 'contrition and epinephrine'...priceless!... you know Epinephrine is a 'hormone' that is chemically identical to the adrenaline produced by the body, just saying... It's not over 'til the fat lady hums a few bars... ;) xo
Ha, I wasn't blaming him, just acknowledging his presence...I actually had 'adrenaline' in there fir.. read moreHa, I wasn't blaming him, just acknowledging his presence...I actually had 'adrenaline' in there first but I ultimately elected to go with the hormone for a number of reasons...you know I always do my homework Mrs.R ;)
What's that quote by Neiztche? Those who were dancing were thought to be insane by those who weren't, or something like that...not that it means we aren't insane mind you haha So glad you enjoyed this one love...xo
yes .. you point out this weakness with aplomb .. when my children were little we had to sing the "I'm wrong" song when we were wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwrrrroooo..... (oh damn .. so hard to say) sometimes they (my children) ganged up on me and i had to dance as well .. ;) i have never been dissappointed reading your poetry .. the analogy of the rock concert is fresh .. nice job!!
E.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I have more experience with this conundrum than I care to admit my friend...thankfully nobody has ma.. read moreI have more experience with this conundrum than I care to admit my friend...thankfully nobody has made me sing a song, yet ;P I had the analogy in my head for quite a while but it didn't make it any easier to write...it took forever, but it was worth it...thanks so much E :)
10 Years Ago
yes! the ones we struggle with the most .. end up very well .. if you became satisfied with less the.. read moreyes! the ones we struggle with the most .. end up very well .. if you became satisfied with less the analogy would have come across as stretched .. i can see how it was not an easy one ..
Rock on bro! :)
E.
Sometimes we are made to feel guilty by people who are really at fault, but turn it around on you till you are so confused that you apologize for something you didn't do.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
I've been on that end of it a few times...it's actually been pointed out to me by more than one pers.. read moreI've been on that end of it a few times...it's actually been pointed out to me by more than one person that I am an excessive apologist...but I also have an acute sense of when I really have screwed things up...
And shall I curtsy, or stand straight as an arrow while growing ever taller to reach that glass curtain that divides our emotions - it is all a question we must answer when determining what is most important in how we treat ourselves, or yield to others. When the dust is settled in the concert hall where the stage was filled with personalities of every possible genre, who is left to understand what they said, rather than what they meant to say? The clapping clashes of contrition and epinephrine can be explosive enough to completely negate the other. Fear and sorrow too often walk hand in hand across a stage while confidence hides behind the scenes.
After all isn't there "Too Much Between Us" (love the song choice) not to know? - one should!
Very interesting write - but yours always are my friend!!
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Your insights are more profound than the poem itself, as is often the case my friend :) I know just .. read moreYour insights are more profound than the poem itself, as is often the case my friend :) I know just what you mean on the confidence thing...so glad you enjoyed this one, and the song as well...your support and kind words are a constant source of inspiration, thank you Sheila :)
you know, it's both meaning it, understanding what was at the core of the mistake, how the other person has been hurt, and actually making the changes needed so that the mistake is not repeated and both people learn (or can learn) even more how to trust and love each other (in any kink of relationship).. using your analogy of the R&R concert, there is listening to the music and then there is the "mosh pit", the dancing, two different things and continuing the analogy, two different experiences and exchanges.. so yes listen, but more dance!!! its like you can't dance if you don't listen, but listening makes you get up and dance..
my analogy is too whimsical for this poem though, apologies, making mistakes are hard, and painful, especially for the one hurt... but waiting is often seen as trying to figure out a "story", to smooth things over when what is needed is to dig into the roots of why and then correcting... anyway, I wish I could say I have never had this dilemma Steve, but being male and being old, that's two strikes right there. Sorry, now my review is longer than your poem... maybe I should have just said "ditto KL"..
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Everything you've said is right my friend...I can add little else to it except to say that yes, I've.. read moreEverything you've said is right my friend...I can add little else to it except to say that yes, I've had a lot of practice when it comes to apologizing for stuff...on the flipside, I'm very good at holding grudges (I'm getting better at letting things go with age, but I wonder it's just a byproduct of can't-be-bothered-ness) ...I think this was an attempt at trying to 'reconcile' the two sides in my mind...yes, too much time can be interpreted as formulating an alibi, but there is a certain danger in sounding desperate, which can easily happen if your words aren't chosen carefully...it's a messy situation either way, but anyone with any sense of dignity will have to apologize for something at some point in their lives, probably multiple times...thank you as always my friend for taking the time to dial into my words as deeply as you do...there's no such thing as right or wrong when it comes to interpreting a poem, but you never fail to hit the nail right on the head.
Haha I guess I did add a lot to it after all didn't I? ;)
10 Years Ago
wait, Steve, I need to apologize.. er.. I mean..
my thing has usually been wading in a.. read morewait, Steve, I need to apologize.. er.. I mean..
my thing has usually been wading in and then having to apologize for many things at once. But I usually know at least certain aspects of what is wrong. my mom used to say to me "why are you sorry if you're just gonna do the same thing over and over again??" If someone holds a grudge, it doesn't matter how deeply or honestly you apologize or change, they will not accept it and you just have to move on and still not make the same mistakes over again. In todays world where we are even more thoroughly atomized and competing with each other for everything, including love and affection, it is difficult to not make mistakes, yet alone correct them and strengthen friendships etc..
Are you sure I can't apologize?? For something?? Anything??? I know, I got up this morning.. er... as you can see it's early evening and I'm in a silly mood... one last thing, sometimes its the honest attempt that matters, not the words, but the intentions... in a cyberspace world where contact is at best video chat, you can't always know cause you are not face to face and it's all just words... sorry state isn't it..
10 Years Ago
Haha I hear you my friend...it's been pointed out to me by several people that I'm an excessive apol.. read moreHaha I hear you my friend...it's been pointed out to me by several people that I'm an excessive apologist, but I do know when I've genuinely screwed things up...cyberspace is a two-edged sword for me...words are my comfort zone, so it is probably natural that it feels like the only place where I can be myself in my purest state, but one is always at the mercy of context, and you never know when something's going to get misconstrued in spite of your best efforts...sorry indeed, but hold on to the silliness as long as you can, it's not a bad thing to have :)
Your words really hit home with me today...sometimes an apology is all that is needed, but it has to be sincere. There is someone I need to apologize to - thanks for the wake up call. I appreciate you! With that said - your poem is brilliant. I'm in awe of your talent!
:) Julie
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thanks so much for this lovely review Julie, your kind words never fail to humble and inspire me :) .. read moreThanks so much for this lovely review Julie, your kind words never fail to humble and inspire me :) I'm glad that I could inspire you as well...it means a lot to know that my words can do that :)
My first book is out! Any comments that anyone may have to offer regarding my work would be deeply appreciated, as I'm yet to get a review.
www.amazon.com/Waltz-Around-Swirls-Steven-Fortune/dp.. more..