PASS THE SYRUP

03 29 14

Olive branches smother and dismember
in the mud giggling in time
with the squish emanating from
my alternating huff and puff
footprints

I trudge in Winter's sweat of
schizophrenic rain
My old defence, sheepish stolidity,
got tweaked in a twist-up
tight as a candy cane
with a modest gasp
of underground success

That shadowy hush of acknowledgement
ballooned in my ear like a blow fish
amplifying the environmental inertia
that never made me happier
nor this sad

I may have been mad
walking from informed opinions
like a failed Orpheus
but defence shouted in silence
and I returned home
to the unconditional support
of a pet art

Acknowledgement's shadowy hush
tore a blister trail down my back
The ointment of Winter will soothe and
release me before billing me
with a scar and littering in the recycle bin
of who I want to be

Today I wanted to be accepted
Night has arrived with reinforced snowflakes
and the chill on my hot back
has me wondering if I would rather be feared

Author's Note

Reviews

[redflutterby]

Ahhh...Steve. I know where this one comes from and its sadness makes me sigh. I would hug you but youre too far away. Sweetie you dont want to be feared...theres no good in that. You just want to feel accepted and acknowledged. You dont need to look much farther then right here for that. You are an amazing poet and a wonderful friend. ;-)

[kublakhan27]

You have brought a smile to my face and my heart my dear friend...I don't think hearts smile but you know what I mean ;) I feel much better now than I did when I wrote this and you have a huge part in that. It's true that I don't want to be feared, but that's how it feels when I struggle for positive attention...I'll just take any kind that I can get haha Thank you Red, for all the support you've given me, especially recently...I may not have been here today if not for it :)

[Lydia Shutter]

Attention....we all crave it on some level. Is acceptance worth more than being feared? Kind of like positive vs. negative reinforcement. Just want to be noticed...the reason is immaterial. You pen the merri-go-round of emotions so well, Steve. The imagery is nearly psychedelic! Written with a vulnerability that is charming....and so very human. Your poetry is incredible. There, take that as acceptance because I meant it as such! :) Lydi**

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much Lydi, this review truly means a lot to me...I think you've covered a lot of the things I hope to exhibit in my writing as it relates to my personality. Merri-go-rounds, psychedelia, vulnerability, they are all words I would probably use to describe myself if asked. And human...I think that's the most important one of all...as long as I stay human, there is an opportunity to reach out to people with my writing. So glad you enjoyed and sympathized with this one my friend :)

[Melobldnfr]

...if I would rather be feared...

Wow. Who has not wondered and pondered this, my friend? Excellently put.

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much Mel, this one is pretty personal, I'm glad it spoke to you :)

[Shadow Paradox]

Sad and deep. The emotion here is a carousel spinning chaotically in a twisted reflection of darkness. The last part really hit me. Where it says today I want to be accept yet something makes you turn gears think whether you should be feared instead. Maybe you would be accepted by of being fearful instead of being accepted by who you truly are. Just some thoughts. I feel like I can relate to this.

[kublakhan27]

So glad you enjoyed this one and could understand where I was coming from Psyche...all of these things were in my head as I wrote this, and stayed there after I wrote it. Many thanks for the read and review.

[Shadow Paradox]

You are very welcome :)

[Ravyne Hawke]

Powerful! I love the way you've combined words and phrases that one would not normally use. Another great poem Kubla!

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much Lori :)

[MsJewel]

Sad and yet written with a tenderness that truly touches the heart. I like the way your mind works. Brilliant writing from a brilliant poet

:) Julie

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much my friend, I'm truly humbled by your kind words :)

[WE]

Such an intense sadness beautifully inked

[kublakhan27]

Thank you gracey :)

[Sarrah.246]

Love this. It has so much simplicity

[kublakhan27]

Glad you enjoyed it Sarrah :)

[KAOlmsted]

What happened, sugar...you want I should go mess someone up? This is heartbreakingly beautiful. Email me sometime, I miss hearing from you. xoxo

[kublakhan27]

Haha I got a laundry list my dear ;P So glad you enjoyed this...I've missed you too, trust me...I'll be in touch very soon...xoxo

[KAOlmsted]

I got your email...thank you! I've been insaneballs busy but I'll try to get a reply to you soon xoxo

[prachi prangya agasti]

sad yet nice write..... beautifully penned

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much prachi :)

[Eric Pudalov]

I see what you meant by people thinking your poetry is cryptic, and yet I think I do understand. It seems as if you're talking about a person (or people) who acknowledged ("That shadowy hush of acknowledgement") and perhaps complimented you.

Yet once the positive ego-boost of the compliments wore off (Acknowledgement's shadowy hush/Tore a blister trail down my back"), your mind struck back at you twice as hard, leaving you worse off than before.

I believe we all have that inner enemy, especially artists and writers. No matter how hard we try, and how good our work may come out, that inner voice will likely tear us to pieces. If we are struggling with mental illness of some sort, that can make it all the more challenging.

Nonetheless, it is what makes us stronger, and inspires some of the best art (I think).

[kublakhan27]

You're very much on par with my train of thought here my friend...whoever came up with the expression "damn with faint praise" must have been an artist, and that was probably thinking of him/herself at the time. Confidence is not my strong suit...I never truly feel accepted even with my friends here constantly propping me up...I wonder if I would even write were it not for that. Thanks so much for the insights and the support :)

[Eric Pudalov]

You're welcome...and trust me, I do understand that part!! My inner critic is the worst, it seems.