Not a single messenger of solid clarity is safe beneath my senses
The most trivial of visual acknowledgements shrivel windows into nominal extinction before me
Poor Winter windows sentinels of colour gone stark I'm afraid I must declare you all mirrors now tethered in the wayward blisters of an inconsistent rain
Poor Winter poles all your schoolyard tricks of adhesion will be numbed by the leather of my chapped lips while my eyes blur your icy emblems into epitaphs
"I'm afraid I must
declare you all mirrors now
tethered in the wayward
blisters of an inconsistent rain"
These lines make me think of someone I used to know and hate. Someone who I thought I loved. that is just a reflection of what I abhor . Nice write Kubby
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Well, it isn't an ode to the carefree idylls of childhood to begin with my friend. This was written.. read moreWell, it isn't an ode to the carefree idylls of childhood to begin with my friend. This was written on a cynical day for cynical readers who know where I'm coming from, which you do. Glad you enjoyed it Kleio.
Poor Winter windows
sentinels of colour gone stark
I'm afraid I must
declare you all mirrors now
tethered in the wayward
blisters of an inconsistent rain
Brilliant writing my friend. The chill of winter can make even the most positive person feel a little melancholy...
:) Julie
Poor Winter windows... I'm afraid I must declare you all mirrors now...
This concept struck me. You want to look upon the outside world, perhaps even join in, but Winter has kept you bound, so all you can do is become introspective, seeing what you already know is there... A deep write, Steve, and one that many can relate to this time of year. Remember that Spring is always there, waiting...
I had much in mind when I scribbled that down my friend...I've hardly been in an upbeat state of min.. read moreI had much in mind when I scribbled that down my friend...I've hardly been in an upbeat state of mind these days and our weather has just been bleak...it's been mostly cold rain which does nothing constructive for me on any level...at least if it were snow I could take in the scenery haha Anyways you get the idea. I'm glad I was able to enchant you a bit with my plaintive musings haha Thank you Rita :)
10 Years Ago
Believe me, even snow has its limits as far as being inspirational... Tons of snow still on the grou.. read moreBelieve me, even snow has its limits as far as being inspirational... Tons of snow still on the ground here, and due to sub-freezing temps it's going nowhere fast. Blah... But, the hot chocolate is nice... :)
10 Years Ago
Yeah we got another storm coming through tomorrow, and of course it would come on my payday when I h.. read moreYeah we got another storm coming through tomorrow, and of course it would come on my payday when I have errands to run...I'll be sure to pick up some hot chocolate though ;)
My friend, you seem locked in a winter'd state of mind. Love the pole and adhesion reference...schoolyard pranks gone awry. This piece feels a bit delicate to me, like one of those icicles I know must be dangling from the eaves of your place. They are beautiful, but when they fall, splintered into so many pieces only to melt back to where the had come from and probably start all over again. When winter comes my friend, and comes hard like it does in your part of the world, we all become those icicles and we all eventually fall...but spirng is on the horizon and soon we too shall melt and re-start again the process of watching winter waving in the distance. Very cool Steve. I got a chill reading this one.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Quite possibly the most moving review I've ever gotten my friend...I thought I was going to well up .. read moreQuite possibly the most moving review I've ever gotten my friend...I thought I was going to well up upon reading it. Thanks so much Jack.
Now I know that this is not about my Steveroo.... Actually, I lied, I know it is about you bud. I loved the wording in this one, you've written it from you heart and threw all the emotion in to it.
I do hope you feel better soon, my friend!
Great job.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Haha Yes you know me well Noodlebop...most of what I write is fairly personal but this one was defin.. read moreHaha Yes you know me well Noodlebop...most of what I write is fairly personal but this one was definitely written in the here-and-now, in terms of how I was feeling at the time of writing. I'm feeling a little better today...thanks bud :) x
Somebody's not feeling it eh? Love the title, sounds like it could be a blues & jazz club. I thought you came alive in winter Benji, this has so much angst folded over and splatter'd on tearful windowpanes. That last line is just deadly, left me with a heavy heart. As usual you spin your pen in astounding metaphorical genius, just try to lighten up that darkly ink'd color my love. :-) xoxo
100 numb'd epitaphs
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Haha I thought that as well Mrs.R, but it's been coming and going in spurts...maybe that's what I ha.. read moreHaha I thought that as well Mrs.R, but it's been coming and going in spurts...maybe that's what I had in mind when I mentioned the rain. The sense of accomplishment I get from finishing every new piece is vital to me, and I did feel better upon getting this one out. And of course, the significance of your support is immeasurable...I don't know what I'd do without it...thank you love :) xoxo
10 Years Ago
Always Benji, always....and do you think we could talk the illustrious Mr Cohen to sing here, I thin.. read moreAlways Benji, always....and do you think we could talk the illustrious Mr Cohen to sing here, I think he'd dig the club name, it's right up his dark alley. ;-)
..."blisters of an inconsistent rain" That is so textured! Inconsistent rain stings. Emblems into epitaphs...puts me in mind of a paradigm. You manage to twist the mind into such provocative, perhaps melancholy, but potentially productive thought - thus: inspiring. Inspiration brings light even in the rain. Thanks.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
It was certainly written in a haze of melancholy...I'm so glad you were able to pick up on that vibe.. read moreIt was certainly written in a haze of melancholy...I'm so glad you were able to pick up on that vibe. And yet creativity always makes things a little better and more bearable. So glad you enjoyed it my friend, thank you :)
My first book is out! Any comments that anyone may have to offer regarding my work would be deeply appreciated, as I'm yet to get a review.
www.amazon.com/Waltz-Around-Swirls-Steven-Fortune/dp.. more..