CANDLE LOGIC

10 23 13

Let's apply oblation to our hardships

Obliterate the temptation 

to trip on languid lower lips

imprisoning our stiffer upper lips

Let's apply oblation to our grief

Freeze the imitation waterfalls 

of hot wax sliding through 

the slippery stalagmites

scaling the perimeters of

our duet of melting candles

Let us groom the fire for oblation

like the old Greeks did and

take a flyer on the 

possibility of comfort

Let us take a lesson from

the pond of hot wax 

destined to rebel and drown

the wick before it brands 

lethargy on the local phoenix

Author's Note

I put this together in ten minutes. I don't like posting things I put together in ten minutes, but you know how it is as a writer...there are some things that just have to be said.

Props go out to Frieda for a subtle suggestion that made me like the poem more than I initially did ;) Mind you, "like" is a relative word there...

Reviews

[Frieda P]

Deep sigh here, although I"ve read it already, it's still affecting, not to mention your genius in slapping it together, but the effect from the standpoint of grief. We share this similar pain, and I found the title to make sense in some strange comforting way, 'logic' is there any when it comes to this pain and suffering, only within the rituals and sacrifices we make getting to the point to make it possible to get to that next day, sometimes that next minute in time. You know I 'felt' this one my dear friend. xo

[kublakhan27]

We cope in very similar ways my dear...sadly there have been way too many instances to allow me to come to that conclusion. The title was the first one that sprang to mind when I started thinking about it, and I do think it's sympathetic to the way you've described it. In times like these, we have no choice but to put all our eggs into the basket of tomorrow, and just hope it brings better tidings. I'm sorry you had to relate to this piece naturally, but I'm satisfied in knowing you felt it, as it was really for you to begin with. Thank you Frieda...xo

[Frieda P]

Okay hon, you have finished me off with the music now.... much love my sweet friend. xo

[kublakhan27]

I've said it before, but I hope you're thinking happy thoughts my dear friend...xo

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Brilliant metaphors. It takes a philosophical mind to write something as deep as this. Applause! :)

[kublakhan27]

So glad you enjoyed it, thank you Blue :)

[Ken Simm.]

Its the flow I like here. And I like it a lot. It is indeed like the melted wax flowing down a candle. It is indeed smooth. A well composed (ten minute?) write that seeks the corners and hidden places of my mind.

[kublakhan27]

I'm a big fan of flow and rhythm, and try to work them into my poetry as much as I can. So glad you enjoyed it, thank you Ken.

[SHEEMA HUQ]

I found the way in which you incorporated process of melting candle wax, very clever, a really enjoyable poem.

[kublakhan27]

So glad you enjoyed it, many thanks.

[kublakhan27]

Hi Bro,

I know, since the last time we spoke, I got a review on this one, I shall not post here right now, for I think I understand this one much better now, so here's my next try lol....
I feel grief, in this one, rebirth, and a strong bond and togetherness with a special person ;)
A connection to be one, in hard times, with each other. And as I said before, wow, in 10 minutes, and still you're insecure, of how it turned out, (it did so well). You write like a god, in English!

I found it very symbolic, and logic all the same way. Selfless too.
Great work my dear.

- Elisa

[kublakhan27]

You are exactly right on all points here Sis. This was written for a dear friend who, like me, has endured not one but several untimely deaths in recent months, both close friends and close relatives. But I did try to inject some optimism into it at the end, which you also picked up on ;) It is symbolic, and logical, at least as logical as I can get haha

A god? Wow, that's a lofty compliment my dear. You stopped me in my tracks when I read that haha But you know your support means the world to me. Love and hugs to you :)

I'm glad this one was a bit more on point lol ;) You're the very best friend, bro, and soul one can wish for, keep on being you! xo

[kublakhan27]

That goes for you too sis, love and hugs :) xo

Awwwwe xoxo :)

[writing mojo]

10 minutes! Wow such symbolic freedom tones, very rhythmic in the inflamed you urn to hold and burn away any day dyer flutters wanting to get too close...amazing piece

[kublakhan27]

Being a personal piece, I think this one may have been written in my subconscious for a while, as I never write anything this quick haha Glad you enjoyed it my friend.

[Kenneth The Poet]

And this is why people read you...those concluding lines should be quoted in literature classes to come.

[kublakhan27]

Thanks for the humbling words my friend, greatly appreciated.

[Leslie Philibert]

Enjoy the way the imagery is consistent !

[kublakhan27]

Thank you my friend.

[Hitchhiker]

Ahhh . . . There is a deep and resounding thought process which caused these words to be written. And, after they have been writ, there is a deep and resounding thought process occurring this reader as I delve into its murky, but exhilarating revelations your words bring to the forefront.

[kublakhan27]

Yeah I knew when I wrote it, even way back then, I knew there would be murkiness involved. Glad you were still able to take something from it though, thank you :)

[Hatchling]

Lovely poem. I enjoyed reading this :D :D

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much :D

[Laura Yorke]

I'm not sure I fully understand what you are saying, and therefore the poem really, really makes me think. I like that. The rhythm is beautiful. This poem makes me want to sing.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Laura, so glad it struck a chord (no pun intended haha) with you :)