TOMORROW MAYBE FOR THE MOON

08 11 13

The powder blue of morning
was somewhat uplifting

The caloric sun made marvelous
use of the clouds'
incompatible design and
hurled at the flimsy white
patchwork its essence of
illumined effervescence

And the dawn came down
like a comb on the frizz
of the wind-tickled brook
spreading Lilliputan shambles of
fluorescent marbles
like dandruff flakes shaken
off the shoulders of the sun

More uplifting was
the blue July's selling out
to evening cloud cover
regrouped and not to be
outdone or outshone
by the tambourine moon man's
after-hours entertainment

Little time was spared in
the clamping of empowered fluff
onto the betrayed scenery below

Somewhere up there was Apollo
choking on a rust tint
retching on the hapless scenery
smarting yet from the blue betrayal

And an orange stress ball
was hurled over a disgusted shoulder
for an aimless stroll around
the sky's newly-minted mattress

Let the moon man march
to his own nocturnal beat
like his telescopic throng of stalkers
Let them just forget about
today until tomorrow when
the sun regroups and may be
seeking out a rhythm for
a taking of the blue

Author's Note

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

An almost surrealistic portrayal! I glean from this you are saying we are but specks in the universe. We can never do or create what the moon, the sun, the stars create on a daily basis. We are impotent compared to the magnificence of their accomplishments. I think you can juggle adjectives better than most and the imagery they create is incredible. I could almost see people following the moon across the universe....doing his bidding. The sun is bright and shining and people think all light originates with the sun, but you are pointing out the moon has his own brand of light. You pack so much into every one of your poems. I feel I could study one of them for months and not garner all you meant to say. Excellent work, Kubla. Lydi**

[kublakhan27]

You humble with your kind words my friend, and have brought a smile to my face in the process. It means so much to have someone dial into my words with this kind of depth and understanding. You've truly captured the essence of the piece in your review, thank you so much :)

[Maryam]

What amazing imagery you have in this piece. I loved every line and every image you painted with your words. Really great word choices. Well written piece!

[kublakhan27]

So glad you liked it, thank you for the kind words Maryam :)

[Frieda P]

As usual your imagery is awe inspiring and brings me to this place of blue contemplations awareness...

Little time was spared in
the clamping of empowered fluff
onto the betrayed scenery below

Brilliant....hoping you found that rhythm to take over your storm clouds my dear friend. You've done an outstanding job, love it from beginning to end, not to mention your impeccable choice of music! Right in my library to savor again & again.

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much love, you don't know how comforting those words are...as mentioned before, this was a labour of love to be sure...my god this was a frustrating one to write, but very rewarding when it was done...hopefully it will open the floodgates a little, or at least leave them a bit ajar...time will tell...and you know I'm a rocker ;) Thanks again my dear, and take care...xo

[Rita L. Sev]

I am in awe of the images you paint here. I want to re-read this in winter, when the skies are grey and I am feeling alone in the Universe...

A coincidence (perhaps): today, on a morning walk, I observed some beautiful cloud patterns in the blue sky; been thinking about them all morning. Logged on here and read your words:

The powder blue of morning
was somewhat uplifting

The caloric sun made marvelous
use of the clouds'
incompatible design and
hurled at the flimsy white
patchwork its essence of
illumined effervescence

You were meant to post this piece today, and I, to read it... :) Exceptional poem.

[kublakhan27]

Haha it's funny how those things work sometimes isn't it, especially between writers ;P People think I'm crazy but Winter is unquestionably my favourite season, the reason being it's my most prolific creatively...writing in the summer is an awful struggle for me, with the heat and mugginess and so on...this one for example took me three weeks to finish, and it had depressed at some points, but it was well worth it :) So glad you liked this one and that you were able to relate to it on that kind of level...thank you Rita :)

[Ravyne Hawke]

It is hard for me to write in the summer too. That's why I write about winter things as often as possible..lol.

[kublakhan27]

Haha yeah it's no coincidence that most of my summer writing is angsty...my winter writing usually comes out a little more celestial providing I'm not snowed in and shack wacky ;P

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

I confess, I date everything too... perhaps it's my inner ego, the little one tucked inside the big one, it has this curious fantasy that someday it will be famous (or perhaps infamous) and it delights in fantasizing the conversations of future biographers, "Oh, that was so helpful - to have dated everything. Now we may construct an accurate and orderly time line of the rise-to-fame and untimely demise." I suspect the moon influences the inner ego while the sun the outer, larger one. You may consider me one of the throng of telescopic stalkers that revel in those "powder blue mornings" while observing "dandruff flakes shaken off the shoulders of the sun." Please, permit me to bump your upliftiness another notch in the positive direction as I reread this piece and admire a coming-of-age, a maturation of growth in thought and style that, having regrouped, seems determined "not to be outdone or outshone."

[kublakhan27]

I link the dating obsession to my OCD, and something I do simply for my own records, but I'm sure there's a part of me that does it for the same reason you do...after all, I think you have to possess some degree of ego to be a poet, it just goes with the territory of writing in that genre I suppose...I'd like to think that there are many ways that this poem can go, but I agree with you on the notion that it all boils down to cycles and coming-of-age, not to mention my weather obsession, which was a frequent topic in my earlier writings...thanks for the kind words my friend, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Riding the Rainbow]

Really full of power and with a very original vocabulary..
Well done!

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Kejara, glad you liked it :)

[Pete Langley]

That was a good day, wasn`t it, Steve? ....a day of optimism, a day when Ra, the Egyptian sun god, elicited elegant original poetry full of imagery and bright thoughts, a day to cast negatives aside and look only forward. Well done indeed, my friend. P.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Pete, I'm glad I was able to stir up your imagination with this piece...I need to write about some other gods some time haha

[ms. barrie]

Brilliant use of such unique vocabulary that you weaved through -out this poem
Is truly astounding, Mr. K! Very insightful write...100 - 100, thanks
For sharing :)

[kublakhan27]

Glad you liked it my friend, thanks so much for reading and for the 100 ;)

[ms. barrie]

you're very welcome, Mr. K. -- was a pleasure to read, this is truly an amazing write :)

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Barrie, that makes me smile, which is saying something these days ;P

[ms. barrie]

You welcome, lol, in the same boat. just woke up and already a
large glass of sangria sounds mighty fine to me :D

[kublakhan27]

Haha I can't say I disagree ;D

[ms. barrie]

yep, large glass of sangria and research. :)

[K. Louis]

The caloric sun made marvelous
use of the clouds


when
the sun regroups and may be
seeking out a rhythm for
a taking of the blue

^ Outstanding lines here! Unique images, lovely!

[kublakhan27]

Many thanks K, I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

And an orange stress ball
was hurled over a disgusted shoulder
for an aimless stroll around
the sky's newly-minted mattress

-- what fabulous lines...favorite stanza, though it was hard to choose.

I love the idea of this one; very conceptual and introspective in a cool and creative way. This piece made me feel as though you truly took your time in choosing your language and your phrasing, because everything really flowed so smoothly and the little metaphors and images fit together like some kind of strange, ancient puzzle. Well done...perhaps one of my new favorites...

[kublakhan27]

I scribbled down the first notes for this piece on July 23 (I date EVERYTHING haha) and it was definitely a labour of love...I can't remember the last time I struggled so much with a poem, but it was well worth it...I had a feeling that it might be your kind of poem, but knowing it's one of your favourites means a great deal...anytime I can get that kind of compliment from a writer of your stature, I figure I must have done something right...thank you Sarah.