I think the more you love and feel loved, the greater the increase of your anxiety because when you do something and feel something beyond the usual for someone you start to fear that you are not good enough and then you lose your clarity. And then suddenly it requires seeing who you are doing it for and their appreciation to make you feel secure. And whoa, your rhyming is awesome!
Posted 11 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
11 Years Ago
Barbie and Ken were the couple I used as a metaphor for this, long before they discontinued with the.. read moreBarbie and Ken were the couple I used as a metaphor for this, long before they discontinued with the production of Ken (I'm pretty sure I heard that a little while ago)...maybe this is prophetic in the sense that even dolls grow romantically insecure after a while :P You definitely become a different person when romance is in your sights...there are not enough numbers to count the times I embarrassed myself through school trying to impress girls...but I've never bought into that "be yourself" mentality that everyone used to try and console me with...at least I got a response when I wasn't being myself haha Thank you Maryanne for reading and understanding :)
11 Years Ago
I got the feeling that you were referring to that doll but I set the name aside and delve into the c.. read moreI got the feeling that you were referring to that doll but I set the name aside and delve into the content of the poem. At least I've learned that assumption could make you look stupid, lol. But there's still uncertainty on there and yes when it comes to love we can become a different person. I for one am520no stranger to it. You're welcome, Steve! Happy April Fools':)
I don't know what happened but it should be: I for one am no stranger to it.
11 Years Ago
There's nothing stupid about what you say Maryanne :) You've never been wrong on anything I've writt.. read moreThere's nothing stupid about what you say Maryanne :) You've never been wrong on anything I've written, this is no exception :)
I like the fact that it has my name it, and ironically i could relate this entire poem to what i felt the first time i was infacutated with a girl....love this poem
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
It's funny how poems/songs with our name in them just seem to work that way...I think a lot of guys .. read moreIt's funny how poems/songs with our name in them just seem to work that way...I think a lot of guys can relate to this one, I know of at least one other...thank you Kenneth
Old but very relevant and artistic...I shudder at some of my old stuff at the very beginning. Oh I was awful...I created a lot of hit or misses mostly missing the mark but i studied hard and worked diligently to find my own voice. You found yours early obviously Mr. Steve ;)
Haha Trust me, the misses far outweigh the hits on my end, I only share the ones that aren't totally.. read moreHaha Trust me, the misses far outweigh the hits on my end, I only share the ones that aren't totally embarrassing...I did a lot of rhyming in the early going, and this was the first one that sounded right, but not before many wrongs got written...thank you Shirlena :)
10 Years Ago
Well I think that is what refines us is the mistakes...I'm grateful for mine because I wouldn't have.. read moreWell I think that is what refines us is the mistakes...I'm grateful for mine because I wouldn't have the "persuasion" that I chose. You know what I mean? It took me a while and I am still evolving :).
10 Years Ago
We're always evolving my friend...that's what inspires us to keep going :)
"My fear will then evolve to death
and she'll move on in haste" I love these lines.
What are your greatest fears?
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
So glad you enjoyed it bud...I'd love to say I'm one of those people that live wild and fearless, bu.. read moreSo glad you enjoyed it bud...I'd love to say I'm one of those people that live wild and fearless, but you'd probably need a series of encyclopedias to cover all of the fears that cross my mind from day to day.
I like the analogy that we are all a simple play thing to others. Unfortunately we are disposable in many eyes but its what we make of these experiences that allows to really learn about ourselves.
A great metaphor for feeling "disposable" in a relationship and/or a clever cry, a la "Toy Story", from the much put-upon Ken. Either way, this is a great read, Steve.
for the more I'm shaken, dropped, and thrown
the more delight she wields
These lines reminded me of Prelutsky's "Oh, Teddy Bear": http://risingwriterblog.blogspot.com/2006/10/oh-teddy-bear-by-jack-prelutsky.html
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Haha True, but it was your poem that inspired me to feature this...I rarely feature pieces this old... read moreHaha True, but it was your poem that inspired me to feature this...I rarely feature pieces this old...glad you enjoyed it my friend.
A really interesting write. I take it you want us to know it's old so we don't think this is a current heartache? Well done.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Oh there are still heartaches, but I find this old stuff to be rather naive compared to how my voice.. read moreOh there are still heartaches, but I find this old stuff to be rather naive compared to how my voice sounds now, and I want to make it a point to distance the two...thank you K.
The title is intriguing and follows suit feeling used and plastic, if not abused as a plaything, sometimes the things, people, we cherish most are discarded carelessly....but only YOU could come up with this analogy Benji! Uniquely you and superb my friend. :) xo Where's that sports car? .........................
So true Mrs.R, you've hit the nail on the head as always...funny, this poem is twenty years old, and.. read moreSo true Mrs.R, you've hit the nail on the head as always...funny, this poem is twenty years old, and i haven't changed a bit...I'd love to say that I have, but no...maybe a sports car would change my tune ;) Glad you enjoyed it love :) xo
10 Years Ago
I guess you have to wait for your mid-life extension crisis haha Don't you know, most everything cha.. read moreI guess you have to wait for your mid-life extension crisis haha Don't you know, most everything changes except the things you want to....sillyhead ;) xo
very poignant write, Mr. Steve...depicting when one keeps giving their
love, to the ones they want to love over and over again...hoping
it'll be finally reciprocated one day. yet the mind knows it'll never really
be, unless it's under a facade or a condition.
I love the sarcastic...disillusioned tone to this...I disagree...
this is far from being juvenile by any means!
excellent write, Mr. Steve! :))
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thanks so much Miss Barrie, I'm glad that this one spoke to you as it did...I'd love to say I've cha.. read moreThanks so much Miss Barrie, I'm glad that this one spoke to you as it did...I'd love to say I've changed since I first wrote it so long ago, but the sarcasm and disillusion are still very much intact...oh well, it keeps me creative at least ;P And thank you so much for disagreeing...I wasn't too keen on that ;) Thank you my dear friend :) x
10 Years Ago
you're very welcome, Mr. Steve :) - true but they're quite stifling
emotions...hard to let .. read moreyou're very welcome, Mr. Steve :) - true but they're quite stifling
emotions...hard to let go.of. yes, I despise arrogance...gotten
a few similar comments like that as well. take care, dear friend xo :)))
My first book is out! Any comments that anyone may have to offer regarding my work would be deeply appreciated, as I'm yet to get a review.
www.amazon.com/Waltz-Around-Swirls-Steven-Fortune/dp.. more..