THE VICTIM

11 07 01

From the victim's inside pocket he derived a wallet-sized coil notepad drenched in blood, coalescing with the dim blue ink neatly settled on the pure white pages within.  It reminded him of some sick, diseased American dream, dying a merciless death in the vice grip of his pink-sweated fingers.

It was not the precision of this image that drove him to drop the notepad in a wince, but a scent, not of fresh blood or of sweat now dissolved, but of words, burning like rubber in the tempered friction of his skinless grip.

Author's Note

Another one dredged up from the murky mists of a time.

Reviews

[KeeD]

This draws such a vivid picture of a blood curdling moment where you need to get your message out but it might be too late. Such amazing imagery and so well penned. Loved it sir, you're a true blessing to this website , for me I have much to learn through your writings. I want to be able to have a style similar to yours someday. Much respect.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Keegan, that truly means a lot :)

[bryandc15]

Intriguing title, poetic words .... all done perfectly .... for that this deserves thumbs-up:)

[kublakhan27]

Thanks I'm glad you like it :)

[Leigh]

If the quality of the rest of this is of the same standard then we need to see it, very high calibre of description I think, more please

[kublakhan27]

No these are the best parts, honest haha Thanks very much^^

[That_Girl]

Jesus even your author's notes are poetic! lol

Imagery is spot on, lovely job!

[kublakhan27]

Haha because I had nothing else better to think about ;P Thank you Avy :)

[KAOlmsted]

Nicely done...the images will linger.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Kim, be well :)

[Abdul Batin Osman Bey]

interesting imagery I dig it

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much^^

[quinfinn]

for all i know this is about a mugging victim who is anguishing over an unfinished grocery list, but i feel it goes much deeper. at any rate, it is a spellbinding instant in time.

[kublakhan27]

A writer is never supposed to admit to this but your guess is as good as mine haha all I know is a couple of people got hurt :P

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

Gahh! Argg! !_! ...what is this?! It's way over my head but Kudos on the author's note. :)

[kublakhan27]

Haha well it's over my head too, that's why nobody saw it till now :)

[gombeggar]

paints an interesting pic...would like to see more, read more

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much...I opted for mystery in this one as I couldn't really come up with anything else, but anything is possible :)

[gombeggar]

give it some time...i often come back to a page or just a fragment and work on it more

[Frieda P]

Reads like a flashback and trying to put something to rest in my convoluted brain mass of misfiring electrons. Whatever it means, it's mesmerizing in it's content.

[kublakhan27]

Thank you Frieda, this one is pretty dated at this point in time but I love the open-ended style of this one...of course I would go on to become much more definitive in time ;)