You are a mischievous one ghost of influenza compelling me to question the memory of shooing you a few days back My passages lack the liquid obstruction that froze me like a flooded engine so why do I sniff incessantly on a night when unlike a few days back when I swallowed what I should have spit out I feel like a month so precious to my art now swallows me like exhausted gum into its white gut where winter like gastric acid cremates a wonderland I got to visit every year around this time What used to be celestial is now a storm Silver-thawed branches scrawny brats of blizzards now The sole positive remaining I suppose is the nasal shaming of the destination of the wind chill's corrupted water gun in the walls I would have disregarded for a walk in the flurries in softer years But you leave me specter of the flu with the mystery of these dry sniffles
II.
I guess I said too much I should have known better than to agitate a ghost much less a ghost of sickness Now you take it out on my lashes
I should have been content with the dryness I longed for a few days back At least I knew the reason for my leaking then
The imagery of this piece is beyond this world. How does one turn a seasoned flu into a piece of art. A conversational masterpiece between the author and the sickness that infests him. I don't know where you live but i'm coming there, to catch this flu, so I can be inspired to write a great write, just like you. Bravo, this was one of the best poems I've read on this site. Definitely one of my favorites.
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
Haha trust me, you don't want what I had, I didn't eat for three days and lost a few pounds in the p.. read moreHaha trust me, you don't want what I had, I didn't eat for three days and lost a few pounds in the process...I really appreciate the kind words though, and I'm glad to know my writing means something...many thanks :)
12 Years Ago
Means a lot, so much respect for your work. And I could really use the couple of pounds lost, all th.. read moreMeans a lot, so much respect for your work. And I could really use the couple of pounds lost, all these Christmas sweets have got the chubby inner beast roaring. Lol.
The imagery of this piece is beyond this world. How does one turn a seasoned flu into a piece of art. A conversational masterpiece between the author and the sickness that infests him. I don't know where you live but i'm coming there, to catch this flu, so I can be inspired to write a great write, just like you. Bravo, this was one of the best poems I've read on this site. Definitely one of my favorites.
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
Haha trust me, you don't want what I had, I didn't eat for three days and lost a few pounds in the p.. read moreHaha trust me, you don't want what I had, I didn't eat for three days and lost a few pounds in the process...I really appreciate the kind words though, and I'm glad to know my writing means something...many thanks :)
12 Years Ago
Means a lot, so much respect for your work. And I could really use the couple of pounds lost, all th.. read moreMeans a lot, so much respect for your work. And I could really use the couple of pounds lost, all these Christmas sweets have got the chubby inner beast roaring. Lol.
Who knew the flu could be a source of inspiration. Truth always makes a good read, I've had my bout with it, never so clever to get a good write out of it, instead I kept trying to kick it's arse. You did much better, clever read. ;-)
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
Haha I'd love to find more positive sources of inspiration, but when the Muse calls, you gotta answe.. read moreHaha I'd love to find more positive sources of inspiration, but when the Muse calls, you gotta answer right? :P Thank you for the compliments, I'm glad you like it ;)
Well, Ufi said what I was going to say, so there's hardly any point, is there :-p
I really liked this, k...and not simply because my kid has been home from school for 2 days now suffering this same fate...and that I, too, feel as though I am about to succumb...well, thinking about it, that probably is why I liked it ;-) You certainly do have a way with words. I'm not certain just anyone could write a poem about the flu...we should start a contest :-D The best flu poem contest!
*sigh* Unfortunately, I'm too ill to attend...
Thanks for sharing this with us (the poem, that is, not your germs) ;-)
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
I'm sorry to hear that your kid is sick and that you may be on the verge Kim...'tis the season howev.. read moreI'm sorry to hear that your kid is sick and that you may be on the verge Kim...'tis the season however x_x I'm glad you like it and that others like it (except for that one fellow below, whose critical skills hold no merit with me), though I'm gonna let you in on a little secret: my receding flu is only a metaphor against the backdrop of the main theme here...the flu motif is really the happiest aspect of this thing :P Mind you, I'm not the one to make a big deal of such a thing...I am happy with any interpretation I can conjure up with my work :D It's probably not my best but I'd like to go back to it in the near future...again, thank you for the compliments :)
12 Years Ago
Ha! I probably would have caught that if I weren't all hopped up on NyQuil ;-) And, you know, it i.. read moreHa! I probably would have caught that if I weren't all hopped up on NyQuil ;-) And, you know, it is always my pleasure...
Haha it's okay, nobody has yet, but like I said, that's okay...I just may need to write something sa.. read moreHaha it's okay, nobody has yet, but like I said, that's okay...I just may need to write something sadder in the meantime :P
The babble of the burning brain simmers with the seasoned snot and mucus-laden drippings of the season. How apropos that your lashes have forged an alliance with the vision-blurring secretions offered up as clarity of thought; toast this ghost when suppeth thy roast oh gentle beggar of weather-traveled ramble bramble. Let thy nose be content and gay in it's fair calling for that door closes when only the last guest has departed and reason's ration resumes its bold calling. You are a goat herder of no small mastery noble Khan!
Wow, you're on top of your game tonight man, I can't believe how quickly you forged that assessment .. read moreWow, you're on top of your game tonight man, I can't believe how quickly you forged that assessment lol As always, thank you for your input and I'm happy I can produce such prolific responses :)
12 Years Ago
You make me smile, my friend. ...and babble some too. :o)
12 Years Ago
Yes, but you babble exquisitely :) Glad I make you smile^^
My first book is out! Any comments that anyone may have to offer regarding my work would be deeply appreciated, as I'm yet to get a review.
www.amazon.com/Waltz-Around-Swirls-Steven-Fortune/dp.. more..