SEROQUEL

10 25 10

It's that kind of tired
where yawns
snuggle up beneath your tongue
and sleep
through dependency
while your cheekbones
seize the opportunity
to stretch your face
and take your eye
balls down with them
and like a mood swing
make you feel
nonchalantly awake
then
as if on liberated slinkys
jack up and take
your mouth with them
red-handing
those yawns
you so terribly depend on
to shut out
the lights on your stubborn
insomniac ball
of a brain

Reviews

[Angi]

Seroquil, Gabitril and Paxil kept me in a persistent yawn for months. Throw in an Ambien here and there and I was a walking zombie. Powerful stuff that I will never ever take again. There are days that I cannot remember any part of. This poem makes me shudder to think back on that slice of my life. Description is spot on, Steve. Angi~

[kublakhan27]

Paxil was the first thing that was ever prescribed to me and I dropped it the first chance I got...as for the Seroquel, I've been on it for a few years now and I've become rather immune to it...all I know now is that I've got a chance at a decent night's sleep if I take it, and absolutely no chance of sleep if I don't...this is the first time I've looked at this piece in a while and I find myself feeling rather plaintive, but that's a discussion for another place...as is usually the case with such pieces, I'm both happy and sad that you could relate to it...I only hope I get to some stage in my life that won't make me shudder in future years...thank you my friend.

[Angi]

With you having takenthese sorts of meds before, you may know what I am talking about: I get these little electric shocks (for lack of better word) even now (they have tapered to happening very rarely now, but they still do happen) and I have been off these meds for years. I call them 'zings.' They are painless little shocks that remind me of what happens when a fly is caught in a bug zapper. They happen when I am over tired or under stress. Very strange to me and I wonder what residual chemical things are happening inside my head. Do you have these wierd things happen to you at all? I don't get plaintive from this piece at all, just a description of what happens when that kind of tired comes upon you. I found it very well done.

[kublakhan27]

It's hard to explain...I've no doubt that I get these zing-like moments, but I have so many things going on in my head that I don't know what's what anymore, I really don't...it's plaintive for me cuz I don't know what the future holds for me...I guess it's natural for everyone to be frightened by the future but it's especially so for me, cuz I look back on 36 years of life and can come up with no more than a few months when I knew genuine happiness...I'm frightened cuz I see nothing in the immediate future that suggests things will get any better than they've been in the first 36 years of my life...everything's just a blur...maybe all my chemicals have gone numb...

[Angi]

I found that taking all those meds took the Angi out of me. y husband said that he couldn't recognise me when I was on them (they had me on 5 at one time) Some people react differently to psych meds. I really think they hurt rather than helped my case. I understand your fear, Steve and I wish only the very best for you. I see a beautiful soul in a sensitive caring man in your writing. you have so much to offer. Please know that.

[kublakhan27]

You are a ray of light my friend...I have saved these words to my hard drive and will never forget them.

[Angi]

You are so welcome. Have a good evening my friend.

[writing mojo]

I hate Seroquil! hate the name, hate the taste from my dry tongue as I swallowed that chemical noose down! I despised how they stayed left a chalky film in my belly undigested..metabolizing them was a pain in the a$$...
that stuff made me an extroverted hunger thriving zombie; half away awake to the world! One time I remember I was eating a tub of ice cream with one hand and a raw hot dog with the other ..I laugh about it now, but then..ugh it sucked! I didn't even take a full dose, I use to cut those little yellow mothers and take a fourth at night just so I could actually wake up in the morning and be on time for work. They look like little yellow cakes of uranium for your cranium...Sir- Whoa- Kill! I am sorry for my little rant; brought up old memories
Anyway, your poem was right on point..I like how you write; your style. I remember those uncontrollable yawns and your eyes water as your jaw shakes involuntary...bravo! excellent piece

[kublakhan27]

Haha it's alright, spontaneous rants have become their own art form for me...I'm glad the piece resonated as deeply as it did, and you could understand where I was coming from...many thanks my friend.

[writing mojo]

I do admire how clear headed your poetry is, it must be working well for you. My thoughts jump so much when I write that I can't stop to punctuate or use proper grammar without being at risk of losing the thought process I was accompanied with. Salad tossed thinking; but I didn't start writing until I had a nervous break down at age 18. after that writing imagery and metaphor like poetry stuff became a breeze for me...it was the technical stuff that was the hardest for me. my poetry doesn't make any sense to the healthy headed person, but it is and always will be my therapy. Do you channel your chemical imbalance through your poetry?

[Castonovia]

Now you've got me yawning and incredibly sleepy... that sounds like me on video games, wanting to crash, but too adrenaline pumped to crash. Mind running every which way except the direction of sweet oblivion, sleep. Very relatable indeed ;)

[kublakhan27]

Haha I seem to be doing that to a lot of people when they read this for the first time...you definitely know where I'm coming from though...my preference is to write on those kinds of nights but if that doesn't work, I do wind up playing Xbox stuff which is not the best idea...or when I finally feel like I'm ready to sleep, I get into bed and that's when the wheels in my head start going...can't win ;)

[Castonovia]

Exactly, have to keep a pen and paper handy one way or another just in case... at least some things lead to grand ideas, well penned again :p

[kublakhan27]

Oh yeah, my notebook is never far away...most of my stuff comes out of the blue now...for whatever reason I can't just sit down and write like I used to...I can sometimes, just not as much :P

[Castonovia]

Yep especially with everything going on either school... some form of work or just not enough time and even when there is time, always procrastination...

[kublakhan27]

Oh I don't think I could even take this stuff if I was still at school...I'd have to deal with the procrastination, which I did regularly...the one good thing is that I wound up doing most of my work in the middle of the night, so I never realized how much of an insomniac I actually was :P

[Castonovia]

Haha yeppers, same ;D

[kublakhan27]

;D

[Abdul Batin Osman Bey]

I know people on that drug and you have giving me a great insight into what they must feel like and go through. Great Write

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much, if you ever have trouble sleeping, this is what you want...you may have heard that from some people :P

[Kenneth The Poet]

I have been on that drug, and man, I never slept better. I experience that kind of tired every so often when I drive to and from my job, which is an hour away from where I live. I have tried bouncing around in my seat, keeping the air cold but those yawns keep coming until I stop driving. So, so feel this.

[kublakhan27]

Thanks very much, you're the first person that's told me they've actually taken it...I don't think I'd ever sleep without it :P

[Robbie~xoxo~]

I can definitely relate to this! Your depiction of the yawning, (the tired mood swing), truly captures the insomniac's daily struggles. Great write!

[kublakhan27]

Thank you very much :) I don't "live through" a whole lot of things I write but this is one of them :P

[Robbie~xoxo~]

It definitely brings back memories of sleepless nights and long days. Well done, my friend. :)

[kublakhan27]

Thanks again, hopefully they remain memories and don't come back to life :)

[Dark Butterfly]

lol made me tired you meanie-butt!!! lol great job!

[kublakhan27]

Haha don't blame me, blame the meds :P Glad you like it :)

[That_Girl]

I have an insomniac ball of a brain lol

This is wonderful... it has a, how do I even describe this... it mimics the feeling of not sleeping for 3 days and just needing to crash. That sort of loopy, fantasy driven, movie like feeling... I'm not doing a very bang up review here am I? haha I hope you understand where I'm trying to go with this. Lovely piece hun. Really enjoyed it.

[kublakhan27]

Haha no need to worry, I know exactly where you're coming from...I actually go through phases of full-blown insomnia, when I feel like I can sleep only to go to bed and have my mind start wandering every which way (hence the insomniac ball lol) usually in times of stress...but I've written a lot of my best stuff under these circumstances so at least something good comes out of it lol I'm glad you liked it and were able to relate to it on that level :)

[Hamza]

desire to sleep expressed on extremely technical and different perspectives ..
marvelous .. :)

[kublakhan27]

Thank you kindly :) yeah it's a complicated state lol

[♪The Girl Next Do..]

Wow! This is really cool and different, and I appreciate your unique writing sense. Great write! :)

[kublakhan27]

Thank you very much :)

[♪The Girl Next Door♪]

No problem :)