RESCUE OFF THE BANKS OF ACETATE

10 25 12

Free you are Selene

to illuminate the frost

slumbering untrammeled

in the sheets of open

air and darkness

subbing as a mattress

underneath my lazy

living space

Free you are to lay

and cool your cinerecent

cheek burned crimson by

your brother's brush of

golden dotage

How is it that a shepherd

of inhabitants is free to

prod his flock with

orbital abscesses

at will and still be

branded cool with not

a syllable of sarcasm

while you Selene shy

and sequestered though

dutiful and focused on the

bathing of your bleating babies

is branded cold as a

winter pole that punishes

a youthful lick's audacity

Abuse of your affinity

for pasteurized virginity

will not be tolerated

Your warning in a glare

grabbed my vision by the ear

and I heard the implication

of a shove as compensation

for my stretching of fate's

damp cloak when I

reached in for a fistful

of silver ribbons and uprooted

you from the slick

clutches of the pitch sea

and flipped you into my

misshapen yet unwavering

Vinylite dory

I cannot lie to you Selene

woman of celestially

influential lineage

I tingle at the sight of 

your immaculate unblemished

cheek slumbering sedately

in wait for its combusted twin

to upload its florid temper

to the slush tile taking shape

on my floor of permafrost

I cannot deny the smuggling

of an animus of moonshine

through a sigh of longing

The only way of shaking

without physically awakening

your brother and whatever

mate he moderates his

lip service with tonight

while you nurse a bruise

of red abuse I long to see

beyond innate emotion and

caress beyond my limbless eyes

Author's Note

Selene (suh-LEE-nuh): Greek goddess of the Moon, more commonly known as Artemis in recent times...known as Diana in Roman mythology. Brother of Phoebus, god of the Sun, more commonly known as Apollo in recent times. Selene is associated with silver and night, Apollo with gold and day.

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

I tingle at the sight of
your immaculate unblemished
cheek slumbering sedately
in wait for its combusted twin -- wow...magic in words.

You know I am a sucker for mythology, and Selene is one of my favorites (I've written her many times). This was fabulous, my friend. I think, perhaps, our minds share a common thread somehow, because it is almost as though I knew these words before reading them. So many emotions and intricate details. I'm awed.

[kublakhan27]

So glad you liked it Sarah :) That's why I sent the link specifically to you, as I knew you loved her story just from the references I read throughout your own work...this is one of the few pieces of mine that I actually like myself, probably among the top five if I sat down and thought about it haha But I knew you would understand the references and like I said, I was particularly curious about how you'd feel about it...as one who is familiar with the character, I was very keen on getting your input cuz I knew I did something right if you liked it ;)

[Castonovia]

Fluid grace of such otherworldly exquisitness, so sublime yet also divine... hehe... simply adore all mythologies and love your charming word usage, elegant. I simply had to use many voices with this poem as if I was reciting an effortless play meant to be dramatized to its fullest, you definitely captured attention from the audience start to finish, well penned indeed :)

[kublakhan27]

Thanks so much for the kind review :) I had an inclination that this could be a spoken piece but I never thought about the tone it would take on, so that's a good question :P I think it could go a number of ways though^^

[Castonovia]

Many ways indeed and no problem ;p

[Allyson Wolfe]

While I do like this poem, I hate to point out that Selene is not a name or Artemis or Diana. She is a deity of the moon but Artemis is an Olympian goddess and Selene is not. Otherwise I absolutely love this poem and your references to classical mythologies and literatures always make me smile as they are my favorite, and I utilize them in a lot of my work as well. Your rhymes and "messy" structure is interesting to me and I think that it gives the reader a great feel for the character of the moon. Your use of language catches me every time. Definitely one of my favorites!

[kublakhan27]

Haha I knew someone was gonna call me on that before too long :) I was aware of the difference but after looking it up in a few different places, the consensus seemed to be that people just lump them all together now, so that was the easiest way to explain it...I may change it though if enough "diehards" mention it lol :P I am happy and relieved to hear that you liked it though, especially being a fellow mythology buff...I'm always nervous about the reception I'll get from those diehard fans for these types of pieces lol I initially planned to split the sentences into stanzas but I like the urgent feel in light of that infinite night/day cycle...can you tell I'm more of a night person? :P But thank you for the in-depth review and I'm happy to know this is one of your favourites :)

[Allyson Wolfe]

No problem whatsoever! And yeah, it's hard to write as a myth buff because no matter what the story is going to be interpreted in a way that might not agree with everyone. Lovely write overall though.

[kublakhan27]

Very true lol :P Thank you again, I appreciate it :)

[TLK]

I know who Selene is, you vapid oaf.
/stabs with fork.

I must also call you out for 'cinerecent'... you missed an s. HA! I can use google to check spellings! "Somewhat cinerous" indeed.
/stabs with pitchfork.



and cool your cinerecent
cheek burned crimson by
your brother's brush of
golden dotage

This is particularly exquisite. I am reminded of the endless race of sun and moon, which the Vikings attributed -- characteristically -- to being chased by wolves.


"I heard..." to "vinylite" is a particularly long sentence, full of ands. It really made me rush along -- I hope this is the effect you wanted (you're relying on the reader to react to syntax to provide natural punctuation).


"affinity / for pasteurized virginity" is a line I keep coming back to. There is such a rich, creamy feeling of an artificial boundary there. Someone is meddling and holding the moon back. I see this is a great, ironic statement of the moon's freedom. Blazing with the reflected light of her brother, she waits for him to chase her from view.


Additional information: the Aztecs (or was it the Mayans? You know, those crazy kinds of guys) said that gold was the sweat of the sun, and silver was the tears of the moon.
This means that the moon cries a whole lot more than the sun sweats. That's just mindboggling.

[kublakhan27]

-I'm sure a lot of people know who she is, but not everybody. And some people probably recognize the Artemis name more than Selene, so I did stick that in there just to be safe.

-I checked on a number of different places to see how it was spelled and the majority (but not all of them) had it spelled this way. If I get enough messages on it, I'll change it.

-My style relies on natural punctuation for probably nine out of ten things I write. I did want an urgent feel to reflect that constant cycle. Actually I rely on "ands" quite regularly...sometimes I may have overdone it but I rarely get called out on it so I usually stick with it...now that's a lot of "its"...you won't see me use overload a poem with "its" lol Oh, I should mention too that I did toy with the idea of breaking up the stanzas to reflect the sentences but I did decide to stick with that structure.

-That middle tercet is literally and figuratively the centerpiece of the whole thing so I'm relieved that you like that part :) Going back to my idea of keeping the stanzas tight, when I typed it out, those three lines just seemed to belong on their own.

-I must admit I was not aware of the Aztec/Mayan analogy but it certainly lines up with the Greek associations. Those Mayans were a rather mind-boggling (WC's spell check is telling me I can't connect those two words :P) bunch, weren't they? :P

I can't really tell if you liked this overall - my gut tells me that you didn't - but thanks for taking the time to offer such an in-depth review :)

[TLK]

When I google 'cinerecent' the second result is this page... if you start taking yourself as proof of your own actions things will become frighteningly self-referential ;)

I'd say I like at least half of this poem. I wonder if it would be tighter and brighter if you cut it down? Then again, don't trust me, I'm just one reader who is all up in your hair about what google says proper spelling is.

[kublakhan27]

Haha trust me, I'm as spell-conscious a writer as you'll ever come across, so this word did indeed drive me nuts...I wasn't aware of the google thing though...that's kind weird lol :P From an editing standpoint, I'll see how the response goes and take it from there :)

[TLK]

Yeah, google is a dictionary too. (And also a calculator).
If you search for both 'cinerecent' and 'cinerescent' it's clear what is more prevalent on google's version of the internet.

[TLK]

Plus, the more we say 'cinerecent' the more this page is proof that 'cinrecent' is a valid spelling until it becomes true regardless!

cinerecent cinerecent cinerecent