I like this poem :)
I agree! A 'sorry' can't repair the damage that has been afflicted. But sometimes you just have to grin and bear it. I haven't even gotten a 'sorry' for something that has completely altered my life and who I am, but I must grin, bear it, and move on.
That line about "lurk in my moms skirt" kind of struck me as incestuous and misplaced, not as "i need to hide from the big meanie!" So, I'm not sure exactly how the audience is supposed to take it. Maybe a different word choice?
I loved it, nonetheless :) VERY NICE!
Just a tip: Try working on lining up your verb tenses.
i.e., "we start from a surprise encounter,
i never thought it will become deeper"
Yeah, I know exactly where this poem is coming from... Is the next line after 'sorry'.. 'I hope we still can be friends'...?? I think it is.
Having been on both sides of this situation over the years, I can see how the 'sorry'-sayer will hand out pretty much any placation they can in order to get away lightly.. But saying sorry is pointless in the end - if it's over, it's over, there's no more to be said.
This little story-poem portrays the victim's position quite nicely and the bitter consequences it will have on future relationships..
PS. the only thing that i couldn't quite get was... what is a "Goodman"?? - or is that meant to be 'Oh, God man!' ?? And a couple of typos...
hhmmmmmmmmmm lets compare it with a book cover you cant judge a book by just browsing its cover,you'll have to read or even try to scan the pages,,,,,,,,,i must say it is much better to know me perso.. more..